We’ve brought you to cafes in the neighborhood, and your better options right here at home. We’ve shown you classy cafes, conjuring up images of lands far away. Today we bring you back to reality. You’ve got papers due and finals to study for. You can’t remember the last time you showered. Let’s not even think about what you’re wearing. This is no time for class or travel, off campus or on. This is the time to get work done. This is the time to join your school, together in our lonely suffering. This is the time, for Butler and Uris cafes. 

Butler Cafe: (You know where this is)

  • Wifi: Of course. There are 3 types: 1. Columbia University. 2. Columbia University ~Secure~ 3. Some international student’s hotspot
  • Outlets: An estimated 30. Easily accessible if you’re against a wall / in a booth.
  • How much do they hate campers?: An average amount. Less than how much the campers hate the random passer-bys waiting for a spot.
  • Space: 18 four-top tables. Some coffee tables with about 20 comfy chairs. Booths for the elite.
  • Number of people: too many. Especially around 9 PM.
  • Food quality: not terrible? A good selection of salads, sandwiches, sushi, snacks, and various beverages.
  • Price: absurdly overpriced. To quote a fellow Bwogger: “$3.00 for a Luna bar makes me upset.”
  • Background music: None.
  • Noise level: Varies by the time. Usually easy to block out with noise-cancelling headphones.
  • Bathrooms: A women’s bathroom on the west side of Butler 2 with a men’s bathroom just around the corner on the east side.
  • Atmosphere: Sometimes the spot of office hours & breakups, which lends itself to the high noise levels. Expect high humidity.

Uris Cafe: (Uris Hall)

  • Wifi: yep
  • Outlets: If you sit at the weird bar situation by the window
  • How much do they hate campers?: I mean like not really but good luck getting a table in the first place
  • Space: decently big, always crowded with business-y people. (Scary amount of scary people who have their lives scary together)
  • Food quality: Tasty. Try the soup
  • Price: Like fine. The hot plates are actually pretty good and cheap. Don’t get the ludicrous prepackaged food.
  • Music: Nah. Just a lot of consulting tripe.
  • Noise level: it’s not butler, that’s for sure
  • Bathrooms: B school bathrooms, so perfectly adequate/probably better than your hall bathroom
  • Atmosphere: Grab lunch, go over some conjugations, people watch as you eat ice cream. Don’t try to write the next great American novel here.