The scene of the space crime.

The beginning to a new semester. A fresh start for all. Barnard’s been busy over winter break, what with tearing down the library (which is still standing) and opening a new office space with classrooms and and reserves. The LeFrak Center is home to part of Barnard’s library, as well as study spaces, a digital classroom and two seminar classrooms on the first floor. And here is where we reach the problem: those two seminar rooms. Bwog investigated the situation and came up with our own “solutions” to the problem.

In addition to the beloved green tunnel across campus, students returning to Barnard this semester were met with another, more subtle surprise – the renovated LeFrak Center with new hidden treasures: seminar rooms 117 and 118. Lovingly called the “New Hamilton Elevator” by some, and met with claustrophobic distaste by others, the seminar rooms consist of four white walls, an enormous television screen mounted on one of the walls, and an illogically-large table. Every week, Barnard freshmen completing their First Year Seminars squeeze past clunky plastic chairs, making their way around this table to find a spot against the walls.

While likely another initiative on the part of Res Life to further first year bonding, or a reminder from the NSOP committee that #YouAreHere (and can’t move anywhere else, anyway), the seminar rooms, with their tropical climate and exotic construction noises, have been making us wish we were anywhere but here.

All of this begs the question: What can you fit in there? In the hopes that Barnard will find a more suitable place to store their budding scholars, here’s a list of shit (aside from Barnard first-years) that can fit in the seminar rooms:

1. The self esteem of a SEAS student in UWriting this semester.
2. One extremely claustrophobic Henry David Thoreau. (Is it Walden or Walled-in? Haha.)
3. The amount of people in St. A’s.
4. A new JJ’s Place called Millie’s Place (Honestly why hasn’t this happened yet?)
5. All of Columbia Football’s wins. (Because making fun of football never gets old, just in time for the SuperBowl)
6. A nap room for post 8:40am snoozes.
7. The Orgo class average.
8. A horse. One, singular horse. Just put a horse in there and see what happens.
9. The hopes and dreams of a senior going to 1020 on a Saturday night.
10. Shamus Khan’s grading curve.
11. One manspreader.
12. Students who didn’t hook up with someone during NSOP.

LeFrak is Back via The Barnard Website