Daily Archive: December 16, 2016

Dec

16

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how many derivatives of the sadboi can there be? many

how many derivatives of the sadboi can there be? many

Bwog is back with its newest series: Tinder Archetypes. Today, learn how to spot that shady dude who messages you three months after you match from Bwog Staffer Sarah Kinney. Ugh. 

Your phone lights up with a notification. Tinder: Marc has sent you a new message.

Marc? Who the fuck is Marc? It’s finals season; you haven’t been on Tinder in weeks. You open your phone to check the message.

“Hey there. Long time no talk.” Long time no talk? What the hell? You’ve never talked to Marc before in your life.

What does Marc want?

Dec

16

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Columbia finds some sense of school spirit in spite of the bitter cold and upcoming finals

Columbia finds some sense of school spirit in spite of the bitter cold and upcoming finals

Last night was Orgo Night, which occurs every year as the Columbia University Marching Band performs a satirical skit the night before the Organic Chemistry final to ruin the curve (despite the fact that the Orgo final is never actually the following day). This year, CUMB was hit with its own curveball when, a week before the event, the Columbia administration announced that the band couldn’t perform in Butler 209. Bwog followed our own tradition and sent two first-year staffers, Victoria Arancio and Elana Rebitzer, to review the event.

2016 has been a year of craziness and disregard of tradition, and Orgo Night was no exception. Like with everything else Orgo Night-related, the student body had mixed reactions to the news of Orgo Night’s relocation: some were mad at the administration, some were mad at the band, and some were mad at other people for caring about Orgo Night at all. The administration wanted the band to relocate and perform in Lerner Hall, but CUMB had made other plans: since there was Public Safety already in 209, the band placed itself in front of Butler, blocking its entrance. In Columbia fashion, Orgo Night became the Orgo Night Protest, and even before 11:30, loyal Columbia students stood outside of Butler, patiently waiting for the marching band to arrive.

As CUMB began marching towards Butler, the crowd was unsure of what to expect: would we see the band try to fight against the Public Safety members guarding the doors to Butler, or would we be forced to shiver outside in the cold for an hour? Though the crowd started chanting “209! 209!” multiple times before and during the event, the band never actually tried to enter Butler, and broke with tradition to deliver the skit in the ridiculously cold weather right outside Butler. Unfortunately for the few students who managed to grab seats in 209 to study for real, the event was so loud that they probably didn’t get much studying done anyway.

The band began, of course, by making fun of the administrative mess that caused Orgo Night to be held outside to begin with. Their jokes centered around making fun of Ann Thornton, the Vice Provost and Chief Librarian who announced the official change. The band defended themselves by talking about stress culture, proclaiming that “Orgo Night reminds us that yes, you are allowed to laugh during reading week.”

More about Orgo Night after the jump

Dec

16

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Fan of the game or fan of the year?

Fan of the game or fan of the year?

We begin our first round of wisdom from the old ones with Adam Chelminski, who was Head Manager of CUMB last year and member of the CUMB “Bored” for three years (a man of power!). Here’s his advice on comfort zones, relaxing, and cheese. 

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Adam Chelminski, SEAS, Computer Science, Smithfield, RI

Claim to fame: Head Manager of the CUMB for a year, member of CUMB’s “Bored” for three years, ignored by administrators, and possibly your TA if you took DAPME Lab this semester.

Where are you going? Going to travel around Europe and Southeast Asia for most of January, but I’ll be back in the spring helping a Columbia professor launch a new interdisciplinary entrepreneurship program. After that I’ll be starting a full-time job in NYC in August.

Read more for Adam’s advice

Dec

16

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did you learn from your suffering this semester?

did you learn from your suffering this semester?

Bwogline: After dealing with a federal lawsuit alleging that DeVry University issues deceptive ads, DeVry has agreed to pay $100 million. (The Washington Post)

Study Tip: Memorize material in chunks and then review. For, instance, if you have a LitHum final today, try memorizing the plot to the Iliad, then the plot to the Odyssey, and then go over the plot to the Iliad and the plot to the Odyssey. It’s like those name games we all had to play during NSOP. Fun!

Music: Sometimes, during times of great duress, one simply needs to listen to the soothing voice of 21 Savage repeatedly saying “I’m just stuntin’ on my [finals].”

Procrastinate: If you are a budding/suffering artist and/or appreciate budding/suffering artists, head on over to MoMA PS1’s Artists Holiday Party tomorrow from 8 to 11:59 p.m. Unfortunately, your student ID won’t get you free admission—tickets are $15.

Overheard: “Let’s platonically cuddle.”

ancient greeks fighting via Genius

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