On fire or nah?

Students have been hit with a barrage of fire alarms in the past 48 hours: 4 times in EC. 3 times in McBain. Once in Carman. And the JJ’s sprinkler system is malfunctioning. The latest false alarm happened minutes ago in EC.

Is the stress of midterms causing people to toke up at 3:30am on a Tuesday? Or in JJ’s? This doesn’t seem plausible–perhaps this would make sense for the first ring of the bell, but what is the cause of the successive alarms only minutes after students re-enter the buildings?

We would have asked the Public Safety officers in the EC lobby what was going on, but we couldn’t bother to drag ourselves out of bed for the fourth time. Our theory? The campus-wide alarm system is fucked, and now we’re never going to know if it’s some fake shit or if we’re actually going to die. Sleep well!