Columbia’s next president?

Oprah’s possible candidacy for the presidency got us thinking about what celebrities would be fit to take over from PrezBo when he finally retires to a fancy Caribbean island with his Audi. 

Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen: Prepare for trouble & make it double. Could teach two classes per semester instead of just one.

Shailene Woodley: Protested at Standing Rock. Prepare for an even #woker Columbia.

Tom Hanks: Would make Columbia the most likable school in the Ivy League.

Beyonce: She’s amazing at everything, so why not being Columbia’s president?

Timothée Chalamet: Columbia dropout. Hollywood’s next big thing. Donating his salary from Woody Allen movie to charity. That’s good enough for us.

Kate McKinnon: As a Columbia alum, she’d have firsthand knowledge of what Columbia needs to reach its true potential. Plus imagine how great her speeches would be.

Paul McCartney: Sure, he’s not at all qualified, but imagine how cool he could make Bacchanal.

Photo via flickr