Butler Ref (300-level)

You know these people. I know these people. Everyone knows these people.

After spending an inordinate time in Butler this week to study for her midterms, this Bwogger has noticed that each person she shares a study desk usually falls under one of these following archetypes. Here are her observations:

  • The Eater. The Eater likes to open loud bags of chips, or paper-wrapped sandwiches, or maybe is shoveling a full-on, five-course meal.
  • The Old Person. They’re often sitting there reading a newspaper or sometimes a book. Oftentimes, they fall asleep and snore loudly. How did they get in here again?
  • The Couture Model, aka the International Student. They are often found sporting Yeezy’s, a Louis Vuitton purse, and some other expenny shit. Hanging off the back of their chair is probably their Canada Goose (or Moncler).
  • The Person Crying. Self-explanatory. If you’re this person, feel better, and consider following Bwog’s guide to places to cry next time.
  • The Non-Academic. This person is very obviously not studying. They’re probably suppressing a giggle while looking at their screen, or have been scrolling through their phone for the past hour.
  • The Academic. The person actually grinds hard, and kind of makes you feel bad about yourself.
  • The Frat Guy. The Frat Guy’s bros like to stop by the table. He is always talking. In fact, you don’t remember a time when he wasn’t talking.
  • The Accidentalist. This person accidentally opens a Snapchat with the sound on and it’s really loud. Some people around them snicker, and they get really embarrassed.
  • The Hoarder. Having brought perhaps their entire dorm with them, the Hoarder takes up way too much space at the desk. Their papers are….everywhere.
  • The Sus. This person is either really sus or is just watching porn. They could be watching horse porn. We can’t tell.
  • The marching band member in disguise. Remember Orgo Night?

Photo via Bwoggie Archives