Original Facebook post please respond

In continuum with Deputy Editor Idris O’Neill’s complicated history with Columbia Crushes, she is broadcasting a Craigslist-guided job search for the new Columbia Crushes admin. Help us, anonymous Bwog reader, you’re our only hope. 

I am an avid subscriber of the Columbia Crushes Facebook page and have recently not seen the Facebook page update as often as I would like. This is putting a serious stint in my lack of access to other people’s hookups. The last post, published EIGHT DAYS AGO, reads: “CARLOS MARTINEZ U A LAMP.” It is unhelpfully received with a moth image, but there is NO new content to distract me from this awful submission.

Perhaps you have read on their Facebook page about this position opening. You should consider it an unpaid internship. If this displeases you, I suggest you stop reading now. I am only looking for people who are dedicated to uplifting the community out of altruism, not CLOUT. It is important that you also be DISCREET so as to maintain the mystification of this admin role. YOU SHOULD NOT FOLLOW THE PAGE. Anything that ties you to Columbia Crushes could be used against you. If this is something that speaks to you and you would like to be a part of one of the only traditions Columbia has, please DM Columbia Crushes 2.0 stating why you are the best fit.

• Compensation: You will be compensated through the satisfaction of the community.
• Please do not contact job poster except through Columbia Crushes submissions or tips@bwog.com.
• Please do not contact job poster about other services, products, or commercial interests.

Please consider this my formal application via Columbia Crushes 2.0