Name, Hometown, School: Hans E Hyttinen, Earth, SEAS

Claim to fame: Helping create a tech community at Columbia with the Application Development Initiative. Some other stuff.

Where are you going? I’ll be working downtown at a startup called Turntable.

Three things you learned at Columbia:

1. No one is looking out for you all the time. Anticipate the best and the worst, so fewer things come as a surprise. But don’t pretend to know exactly all the things. (That said, there are many people on campus whose job, in some capacity, is to help you… if you ask them.)
2. It’s easier to ask forgiveness than get permission. Make great things and people will pretend it was their idea instead of blaming you for causing trouble. Generalizing this, every human system can be defeated. Don’t assume you can’t do something just because someone said “no” or “that’s how business is done” or “it’s always been that way”.
3. No one appreciates small caps. I took this to mean that anything can be misunderstood and that effective communication takes effort.

“Back in my day…” …you only had bwog.net and you liked it!

Justify your existence in 30 words or fewer. I was once convinced I was Canadian. I had to be told, “You aren’t; sorry“. Sometimes, I remember my rhetorical devices; watch out for some litotes.

Is the War on Fun over? Who won? Any war stories? Right now, Fun is losing—but the war isn’t over, and there actually haven’t been that many battles recently. No stories; I haven’t been on the front lines all that much.

Would you rather give up oral sex or cheese? I’m inexperienced with cheese.

Advice for the class of 2016:

• Join a club or start one! For everyone’s sake, find one thing to do on the side that’s fun or meaningful (or both!) and do your best to ensure it’ll still be here after you leave.
• Go out there and do fun things with fun people… on campus and off. Go downtown (or even to Brooklyn!) and explore as often as you can.
• Be nice to people, especially in anonymous comments. When it comes to online bickering, remember: all this has happened before and will happen again.
• Take Fencing and learn to admire Columbia’s fencing team.
• Take a computer science class, no matter what school or major you’re in. At the very least, learn how to program!
• If you can’t change something, make something.
• Subscribe to the Columbia subreddit!

Any regrets? Joining too many clubs and doing too many Spec Photo assignments my freshman year. Not going to more student performances. Not TAing. Specific to CS: skipping 1004.

Looks like the administration is expecting more of the commotion we saw the last time Chomsky was here. The linguist/philosopher/cognitive scientist/activist etc. returns to Columbia tonight at 6 pm in LeFrak for another round of controversy.

Update, 4:20 pm: We hate to be the bearers of bad news if you were hoping to beat the crowd, but…

Well, at least the weather's nice

You were warned

According to the Center for Palestinian Studies’ site, “Seating is on a first-come, first-seated basis. Preference will be given to CUID holders. Doors open at 5:00 PM. Event will begin promptly at 6:00 PM. Barnard and Columbia students are encouraged to arrive early.”

Top photo tipped by Chomsky Line Expert Hans Hyttinen

Wasn’t it a beautiful night?

Panorama by Robert Colgan

Photo by Hans Hyttinen

Photo by Matt Horwitz

Happy 257th academic year Columbia!

Thanks to YouTube, you can now watch the whole darn thing! Or at least the highlights. Click for the faculty procession, student procession, and PrezBo’s address.

Photography by Hans Hyttinen

Having being directed all around campus yesterday by Public Safety officers and people in ponchos concerned Bwog did not have a press pass, Intrepid Underclassmen Peter Sterne finally found the press section and settled in to watch the commencement of SEAS Class Day. After a procession of old alums, professors, and administrators, KevSho took the stage, asked Prezbo for permission, and kicked off the festivities.

The first to speak was the president of SEAS 2011, Amanda Tan. Both she and valedictorian Norases Vesdapunt drew on their experiences as international students trying to fit in at Columbia. While Tan delivered heartwarming anecdotes, such as her “first immigrant holiday—Thanksgiving—spent with the family of a fellow Columbia engineer,” Vesdapunt spiced up his speech with jokes. Before coming to Columbia, he recalled, he underwent a crash-course in American culture, learning, among other things, the real meaning of “3rd base.” Once he got to Columbia, he fit it just fine, though he did have to explain to some of his peers that his home nation of Thailand is not the same place as Taiwan!

The keynote speaker, Ralph Izzo, MS ’79 PhD ’81, and current head of a company involved in green energy tech, spoke about the importance of engineering knowledge in the world. He recalled his fondest memories of Columbia, “sitting with friends around an old coffee table solving the world’s problems.” Unfortunately, he admitted, he never actually succeeded in fixing the world, which means there are still plenty of problems—chief among them the development of clean and sustainable energy—left for the Class of 2011 to solve.

Dean Feniosky Peña-Mora started his speech by making the newly minted engineers stand up and thank their families and professors, including two visiting professors from Italy nicknamed “the fancy ones” in honor of their eccentric (to American eyes, at least) graduation robes. He then moved on to advice, telling the grads they should strive to use their specialized knowledge to contribute to their communities, no matter how small their contributions may seem. Alluding to chaos theory and the idea that a butterfly flapping its wings can lead to a hurricane on the other side of the world, Peña-Mora told the Class of 2011 to “go forth, flap your wings, and make us proud!”

PrezBo, the only non-engineer to speak, began by thanking “Dean Feni” and lamenting that “I wish I knew what you know.” He went on to explain that most of the world’s problems require technological solutions, and hence engineers. But he cautioned that these “problems are not just technical problems; they’re also human problems.” If only there was an educational program that combined the technical knowledge of engineering with the humanism of the liberal arts—oh, right.

Perhaps the most interesting speech came from Joshua Gaspard, the designated “grad student speaker” who is receiving his second MA at Columbia after getting an undergrad degree at West Point. Gaspard said Columbians would change the world, and predicted that the Class of 2011 includes someone who will cure cancer, someone who will develop a clean and sustainable form of energy, and someone who will develop a financial program and make billions of dollars. “But all joking aside,” he argued, “99% of you will have no global impact on the world.” Unexpectedly, the graduates erupted in uproarious, and perhaps nervous, laughter. Taken aback, Gaspard explained that while most graduates will not make world-changing discoveries, they will have real impacts on the thousands of individuals in their neighborhoods who will rely on them to better their lives. It was a nuanced point, and one that the audience seemed to appreciate.

Finally, it was time to read off the names of the graduating undergrad and grad students, which Bwog estimates numbered about 1,200 and took a half-hour. Afterward, it was time for “Stand, Columbia,” “Roar Lion Roar,” and snacks on Hamilton Lawn. Unfortunately, Bwog did not see any Jell-O shots this year, but we did spot some adorable Blue-and-White cookies.

Congrats to the Class of 2011!

Photos by Hans Hyttinen

Don't miss out on all the fun!

If you are over the age of three, and want to go to Commencement, you need a ticket. Graduating students are only allowed to claim four, and you have to pick them up in person. How surprising that Student Affairs has a centralized and sensible allocation process! Anyway, back in 2008, ESC set up this handy site to exchange Commencement tickets, if you need more than four, were unable to pick them up, or want to give away tickets you’re not going to use. Essentially a customized Craigslist, the site enables you to post extra tickets if you have ‘em, or get in touch with those people if you need ‘em.

Now would also be an expedient time to remind Ye Olde Seniors that tomorrow is the last day to pick up your tickets! They will be available from 4:30 to 7:30 pm in 401 Lerner.

Photo by Hans Hyttinen

Radically transparent Bwog correspondent Alex Jones reports from yesterday’s panel discussion on Wikileaks, which featured Bill Keller, executive editor of the New York Times , and Alan Rusbridger, editor of The Guardian .

Audience members flew around the digital world on their phones–likely checking for the latest updates and videos from the democratic unrest in Egypt–as they took seats in Low Rotunda, a cathedral to the physical accumulation of knowledge that has been left in the Internet’s wake.  Wikileaks: The Inside Story was held Thursday on campus to discuss  the specifics of Wikileaks’ rise to international infamy and Julian Assange’s relationship with established media outlets with those most intimately involved.

From left to right: Keller, Rusbridger, Goldsmith

The panel was hosted by Columbia’s School of Journalism, and was comprised of New York Times executive editor Bill Keller, The Guardian editor Alan Rusbridger, and former Assitant Attorney General Jack Goldsmith (now a professor at Harvard Law). Alan Rusbridger and, to a lesser extent, Bill Keller were Julian Assange’s main points of contact with the mainstream media as he attempted to disseminate formerly secret government documents. Thursday’s panel was the first time that Keller and Rusbridger had met publicly to discuss their process of dealing with the documents and their dealings with Assange. (more…)

Today, Columbia’s Application Development Initiative (ADI) launches DevFest, a week-long technology/business development experience. The group plans to host a series of lectures and workshops, with guest speakers like Matt LeMay of bit.ly fame and Anoop Ranganath, the lead iPhone developer at Foursquare. Fred Wilson from Union Square Ventures will be present at the culminating “Demofest.” As Bwog webmaster Hans Hyttinen tells us, “It’s a big fucking deal.”

Head over to CEPSR’s Davis Auditorium at 1 p.m. for lots of free food at DevFest’s kick-off event—a Hackathon! Bwog hopes it’s as exciting as it looked on The Social Network.

Huzzah! It’s new, it’s now, it’s…Bwog Events! Please direct your attention to our super spiffy events sidebar, courtesy of Bwog tech guru Hans Hyttinen.

• Click on the Events on Campus link and, by the magic of the Internet, you’ll be taken to a snazzy Google Calendar of events run by students groups. Upcoming happenings are listed directly above for reference. Submit to the calendar with the online events form, or if you’re still feeling nostalgic for the ol’ backwards days, email events@bwog.com.
• We’ll keep posting the Bucket List every Monday with recommended academic events and lectures sponsored by departments and other University-affiliated organizations. The Bucket List link on sidebar will lead you to the most recent post.
• Every Thursday, we’ll post Where Art Thou, a weekly arts round-up with separate sections for on-campus student-run productions, department-run events, Miller Theatre offerings, and off-campus Columbia performances. To get on this list, e-mail editors@bwog.com.
• “But Bwog,” you say, “my event deserves more than a mere mention on your round-up or a silly spot on your calendar.” So buy an ad! It’s only $10 per day. Buying a Bwog ad is like flyering in a place where thousands of people pass by everyday without wasting paper! And if you want a more official justification, email ads@bwog.com and ask about our uber-fancy media kit.

As always, if you have any questions, don’t hesitate to ask us: editors@bwog.com.

We have a winner! Jody Zellman captured the first flakes! “The scourge is here,” Jody writes in his winning email.

Look closely!

And a few more snowflakes courtesy of Hans Hyttinen:

Despite weather that’s frigid one day and positively balmy the next, photographer extraordinaire Hans Hyttinen reminds us that fall is still here! Bwog feels all warm and fuzzy inside.

Photo by Hans Hyttinen

Bwog’s people report that the other car that got rear-ended stopped near the next intersection going downtown.

What’s with all the accidents on Broadway?

Photos by Hans Hyttinen and Yenny Su

Before the first weekend of November kicks off and we put away our wigs, face paint and ridiculously slutty attire, Bwog reminisces over 2010′s Village Halloween Parade.

Photos by Hans Hyttinen

It's a Polaroid camera cake!!

There’s free food in the Lerner Broadway Room, courtesy of the Columbia University Photography Society and the Weatherhead East Asian Institute. According to Bwog’s very own Hans Hyttinen, there will be fruit, hummus and other Westside goodies. Rejoice!

Photo from Wikimedia Commons

Lots of adults wearing Columbia blue, a few Public Safety officers, a bouncy castle and dead grass are all assembled on South Lawn, ostensibly to welcome kids to the Kiddie Carnival advertised outside Lerner. But there are no kids. Stay tuned!

Update, 2:20: The carnival has begun! Peter Sterne reports that Elmo and Blue, of Blue’s Clues fame, are mingling with toddlers on the lawns. Bwog asked what was so private about the event, and we were told that it’s “just a celebration of families being held on campus.” Dana Danna Banana is performing live now, just as loud up on our Butler 6 perch as he is on South Lawn. Mr. Banana told Bwog that he “won first prize in the prestigious John Lennon songwriting contest.” He is singing a song about fathers and jungle gyms. There is ice cream out there. If you’re coming to Butler today, bring your headphones.

We just found out that the fair is for a very real thing! It’s for former patients of the Center for Women’s Reproductive Care, a fertility clinic run by Columbia doctors. All of the staffers helping out are doctors, nurses, and embryologists at the center.

Photos by Eliza Shapiro and Peter Sterne, video by Hans Hyttinen