At Columbia, students are taught to challenge each other’s ideas and deeply evaluate the validity of their own beliefs and thoughts. That being said, we can’t really think of anyone who would disagree with the statement below, found in Hamilton 707.

Speaking of sex finals, you may have noticed by our new poll that we’re curious about everyone’s current finals position. Your options, based on the current (premature?) standings:

• Would it look bad if I just slept through this?
• Already finished. Awkward.
• This is my first time, I don’t really know what to expect…
• Coming at it from behind (playing catch up)
• Totally on top of it and liking it

But are negative orgasms less than negative finals?

Finals have you cramped for time? Can’t seem to fit in snuggle sessions with your dearly beloved? Don’t fret, it seems like a productive Columbian has found an out (or an in). 

Guy: ”She signed me in, we had sex, five minutes later, she signed me out. She said I could cuddle if I wanted, but to feel no obligation.”

Sexy Burgers via Wikimedia Commons

This poster, put up by the Ad Council, was spotted in Mudd outside of the Computer Science help rooms. An honest advertisement intended to relay sexual education? Or a subtle poking fun at the sex life of engineers? You decide.

Keepin' it short and sweet

UC Davis chancellor “feels horrible” about the pepper-spray incident. (LA Times)

Where the 51% at in the OWS movement? (Atlantic)

We want you to have good sex. (NYT)

HuffPo Canada’s managing editor experiments with a vodka-soaked tampon…and then writes about it. (HuffPo)

Three American students have been arrested for having participated in the recent demonstrations in Cairo. (WaPo)

Adorable blonde bob from Flickr/gemsling

Today’s Bwoglines challenge the things you love most:

Cartoons: Pinocchio should be punished, Spongebob will destroy our children (Slate, Atlantic)

Cigarettes: The future of smoking is e-cigarettes. (NYMag)

Sex: Has been displaced by Facebook. (Gizmodo)

World History: It’s whatever. (New Yorker)

Take-Out: It’s evil! (Gothamist)

Emoticons: Sometimes they look like vaginas. (NYT)

Google: Is actually taking over the world. (WSJ)

There’s one exception! Beavis and Butthead are not only recognized for their honesty, compassion, and humility, but are also back for a new season, starting Wednesday. (NYT)

this, not this)—Ira Glass’s honor is under attack. The mastermind and host of WBEZ Chicago’s “This American Life” is the star of a celebrity sex tape, Public Radio Nerd No. 1, Austin Williams, explains. ”>

Mr. Glass himself, looking a little less sweaty.

Public radio nerds, light your torches and sharpen your pitchforks (this, not this)—Ira Glass’s honor is under attack. The mastermind and host of WBEZ Chicago’s “This American Life” is the star of a celebrity sex tape, Public Radio Nerd No. 1, Austin Williams, explains. 

Well, sort of. Julian Joslin, (also older brother of CC junior Isabella), and Michael Grinspan, both CC’09, created a brilliant 11-minute parody episode of TAL in two acts (including a closing credits Torey Malatia joke) in which Ira decides to make a sex tape, on air, with Fresh Air’s Terry Gross. Joslin’s take on the icon’s nasal delivery and writing style is spot on. It’s good enough that we’re willing to bet at least one person now believes they’ve heard their favorite radio host’s coital noises. The video is ridicule born out of love, of course; you don’t mimic Ira Glass that well unless you’ve listened to a whole lot of his show. That may have been lost on the man himself, though, who couldn’t even make it through a complete listen.

The real Ira, in the Village Voice:

“I’ve listened to about three minutes of it. His imitation of my writing and delivery are so dead-on, it was hard to keep listening and I stopped. If I had to articulate why, I think it was because hearing his version of me, made what I do on the air seem kind of dumb. And the impersonation was so good, I couldn’t really pick a fight with it. So I had to decide, do I want to see myself as kind of trite and dumb? Seemed better to stop. Maybe I’ll go back sometime.”

Buck up Ira, we love what you do. (Check out the Blue and White interview with him from way back when). As for the other voices, Huffpo explains Julian trolled NPR footage and spliced Terry from nine different “Fresh Air” episodes. And to TAL devotees, watch at your own risk: listening to the podcast while folding your laundry on Sunday mornings will never be the same.

Before AND after shot via Wikimedia Commons.

These soup dumplings are actually the most relevant image that responded to search keyword "steamy." Seriously. The runner-up was a photo of a man's hands resting on an airplane seat-back table.

It’s late April; soon, it will be May. Finals are approaching. We, too, have been spending most of our waking hours—and a few sleeping ones, too—growing paler and paler in Butler, where the existence of something called “sun” is just a vague rumor we overheard two freshmen gossiping about once. So there are really only a few things on every non-senior’s mind right now: cramming for exams, how to schedule maximum Bacchanal day-drinking in light of three essays due the following Monday, whether or not there’ll be a new installment of Butler Bingo…

But—wait! Remember sex? (Note: It’s that thing we allegedly aren’t having.)

Here to help keep it in mind is Columbia’s newest sex magazine, “The Morningside After.” The cleverly titled mag—especially compared to any of our ideas (“CollegeWalk of Shame,” or maybe “In Nipples Tuo, Videbimus Nipples”)—intends to bring sex and sexuality into the mainstream discussion.

Co-founder Leena Charlton (CC’12) told Bwog a little bit about what distinguishes it from sex magazines past. “We aim to be a magazine about sexuality as a whole and bringing it into a popular discussion,” she explained. “As much as C-Spot was one about erotica and languishing in the esoteric nature of sex in our culture, a lot of their pieces ended up being tales of tawdry sex, or erotic fiction that was sometimes a little too imaginative.”

Charlton said that along with short pieces aimed specifically at Columbians, “The Morning After” will include science-oriented articles and longer journalistic features. Its premiere issue hits campus on May 2.

Just saucy enough image via Wikimedia Commons.

There is a high probability you will enjoy the linked graphs more than the this one

A big thank you to Bwog Editor Emeritus but Always With Us In Spirit Anish Bramhandkar for tipping these great graphs.

The people at the popular online-dating site, OkCupid, crunched their user-provided data to create ten very amusing graphs. Among the findings–vegetarians like giving oral sex more than their omnivorous peers, people on Twitter are more than just textually masturbatory, and, our favorite, a graph that correlates college tuition to sex drive. We want to have sex more than Harvard, Wesleyan, MIT, or Penn, less than NYU, UChicago, Yale, and way less than Sarah Lawrence.

Heading back home from an EC party.

This weekend spawned some particularly sparkly gems. First, in the wee hours of the morning, a fairly intoxicated guy and girl approach the sign-in desk. The guy swipes in, but the girl lingers for a moment. She needs to be signed in:

Guy: Oh, so you go to Barnard?

Girl: Um, yeah. Is that a problem?

Guy: No… (looks her up and down)… not at all. Yeah, that’s cool. Okay, I’ll stop talking now.

Girl: Yeah, maybe you should.

Across Broadway, in 600, a Barnard lass had this to say about the her humble abode:

“Barnard dorms just weren’t made for parties. E.C. was made thinking ‘children are going to get drunk and vomit here.’ The architect was LOLing while he designed EC.”

Mysteriously produced image from Wikimedia Commons

A tipster sent in the following piece of insider info, spotted on Carman 12:

Must be Thursday.

Cupcakes served at Sexcellence, courtesy of Elana Gurevich

On the 17th floor of Sulzberger Tower last night, a group of Barnard women gathered to discuss sex in a “fun, safe space.” The event, hosted by the Well Woman group, was titled “Sexcellence: You Don’t Have to Be Having Sex to Come.” Bwog came.

Sexcellence began with an article about the benefits of female masturbation written by former Well Woman Anne Viksman. “At Barnard/Columbia,” she wrote, “it sometimes feels like everyone is either a) having sex b) trying to get sex from somewhere/someone, or c) talking about someone else’s sex life,” Viksman writes. “It never hurts to explore a non-partner option of your sexuality, and to get to know and respect your body.” She adds that some of the many benefits of masturbation include stress relief, stronger pelvic muscles, better sleep, and more intense orgasms. Bwog approves.

Attendees were then passed a “Yes-No-Maybe” list, with different columns listing sex acts, experience with said sex act, willingness to try it, and any “notes and nuances” that may come with it. Students were encouraged to fill these out with a partner and compare notes in order to better communicate comfort zones or particular fantasies. Well Woman representatives went through the list of sexual acts and explained any terms that could be new or unfamiliar, such as “Japanese-style bondage” and “manicures.”

Finally, Sexcellence was concluded with a game of “Sex Taboo” where participants were handed cards that had sexual acts or objects written on them that they had to describe to the group without using certain “taboo” words written underneath (for example, Bwog’s card was “hymen,” and Bwog had to try and describe it without using words like “break” or “virginity”). When the last card was guessed, Well Woman handed out condoms, lube, and extra boob cupcakes. Needless to say, everyone went home well fed and a little more informed about what makes sex, well, excellent.

Kirti Poddar“>If you’re looking to satisfy your craving for South Asian delicacies, look no further than Club Zamana’s Tamasha Hype Study Break. Enjoy free Roti Roll and samosas, but if you want to beat the heat, ice cream shall be served as well. All in Lerner Satow Room, 8-10 PM.

As the Facebook event page so proudly proclaims, free Tamasha 2010 t-shirts will be distributed to the first 40 guests, but all South Asian enthusiasts are encouraged to participate in games like mango juice pong and sex-themed Taboo. Sex and mangoes? What a delightfully original proposition!

Photo via Flickr/Kirti Poddar

Nothing helps a body unwind from a tiresome first week back at school like sex! Well, this isn’t sex, but it’s the second best thing: allow us to present the third installment in our new and improved BwogSex feature. The following contemplations by Kia Walton were written in response to a question left in our anonymized dropbox – Kia is not the sole writer for Bwogsex, but is our Queer Culture Bureau Chief. Send in your own questions, anecdotes, and ideas to BwogSex (anonymously!), and remember, the weather has changed: it’s time to get busy on the lawns!

This question is as problematic as it is interesting and I am grateful for the query. So… let’s dive in!

Firstly, a rewriting of this anonymous question is in order: “How easy is it to ‘turn’ a ‘desperate, straight’ Columbia girl?” It may seem unhelpful to add quotation marks, which seem only to lend themselves to ambiguous definitions, but I find them more helpful than the rigid preconceptions these words may inspire.

Let’s start with the term “turn.” Turning, in my opinion, is impossible. As a friend of mine succinctly put it, “either you have the desire or you don’t.” (That desire being sexual attention from and/or sexual activity with someone of the same sex). I cannot “turn” a girl gay (God knows I’ve tried). I can, however, try to tap into the homosexual energy that I believe nearly every single person has (in varying amounts). I would only attempt to woo her with my charm (which usually just boils down to leaving the room when I rip one) and hope that it draws out what is already present. If the girl is receptive to me, it is not because I was able to install some sort of gay chip in her; it was already there, I just had the privilege of activating it. Read more…

The latest issue of the Fed is out and aping another Columbia publication. Bwog highlights some of its cringe-worthy crassness…

Ergonomics of shaving (ew)

“The Columbia Animal Farm (Get it? They’re communists!) Becomes an Animal House (like the movie!!)”

Same-old hipster hating

Erotic fiction

As Valentine’s Day approaches, Columbia celebrates Love in all its shapes and forms. Today, Bwog’s bawdy buffoonery expert Hannah Goldstein reports on Chowdah’s tribute to the all-too-familiar awkward sexual side of Cupid’s holiday in the comedy club’s latest show, Sextravaganza.

At least among college students, sex humor never really gets old. (If you don’t agree, try turning to the numerous snow penises on campus after yesterday’s storm.) As far as comedy goes, sex just happens to make for a pretty dependable source of laughs. It should come as no surprise, then, that the most successful sketches at Chowdah’s Valentine’s Day Sextravaganza all revolved around hypersexual setups and easy one-liners: there were strangers at a bar exchanging embarrassingly bad pickup lines, dogs mating in bizarre tantric positions, and couples engaging in a very literal sort of role play. “There’s a lot of sex,” said Lily Feinn, BC ’10, who happened to play some of the funnier parts in these sketches. “[In the show,] I have sex with a lot of people.” Read more…