This is the eighth post in the senior wisdom series. Read the rest here.

Jen Schnidman, C ‘06
Claims to fame: Senior Week Grand Dame, University Senator.

Preferred swim test stroke?

Shh. I never officially took the swim test. Hey, does Ken Torrey read the Bwog?

What are three things you learned at Columbia?

1. One semester’s worth of modern Greek.
2. How to survive for days at a time on JJ’s chicken fingers.
3. That administrators are people too.

Justify your existence in 30 words or less.

I majored in Computer Science and I am moving to rural Mississippi next year. Without me, who would start the “Outsource to the Deep South” movement?

What was your favorite controversy in your time at Columbia?

When Bollinger announced he was leaving Columbia to become the president of Harvard. Oh wait, that was just a rumor.

Which Prof do you think would be the best kisser?

Certainly none of my professors. Unless by kissing, you actually mean programming.

What percentage of seniors do you think are virgins?

(CC seniors) – 2*(BC seniors) + (SEAS seniors)
Percent? I don’t have a calculator with me.

Would you rather permanently give up oral sex or cheese?

I love cheese.

Days on campus memory?

Dan Kessler is going to kill me for this. In the middle of an improv/acapella performance on the night we arrived, he yelled “Show us your tits!” to the performers on stage. I know this because I happened to be sitting right behind him at the time. I refused to befriend him for the first two years of college because of this.

Regrets?

Hmm. Perhaps if I had embraced my computer science geekiness earlier, I could have launched theantifacebook.com and would be entertaining billion-dollar offers from major corporations. But then, I would have never been able to compete with SEAS Community, so nevermind. No regrets.