Oct

28

There’s Nothing Like the Last Minute

Written by

Know what you’re going to be for Halloween? Neither do we. With three days to go, it’s time to give in and get serious—you’re not going to buck gender normativity this year, pal. But all is not lost, with this list of easy-to-find, last minute costumes. Hustle over to Ricky’s (you know you’ve always wanted to see the inside) or a friend’s well-stocked closet so you don’t feel like a fool come Friday

  O’Connell’s Cougar: Distinguish yourself from the riffraff with this studded “Waist Beauty” tramp stamp temporary tattoo ($9.99). 


Grad student: She works nights to pay for her Ph.D., but that doesn’t mean she can’t have a little fun.  The “Slutty Barista” ($29.99) is at Ricky’s.





Columbia’s Shrinking Endowment: Find a large friend and wear his clothes. A variation on the traditional “Shrinking Woman” costume.



The Regretful Carman Resident:
Doodle on yourself with permanent marker.  Look forlorn, and repeat: “No, guys! I was napping, not passed out!”

PrezBo: Wear your favorite “FUCK THE DRAFT” jacket. Defend your right to do so.

 Brown Student: Columbia students of the 1960’s wish they were this cool.

Jeffrey Sachs: Buy The End of Poverty, $14 (in paperback) at the bookstore.  Be self-assured.



The Other:
Collect your friends’ University Writing Lens Essays.  Tape them to your body, overuse the phrase “societal construct,” and make people feel generally uncomfortable.

If, after all that, you’re still unwilling to be a cog in the corporate machine, you can always dress up as Jack Kerouac.  Spend the night hunched over your typewriter at the Hungarian—no parties allowed.

 

 

 

 

 

ECS and SCS, photos by SCS

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10 Comments

  1. social construct  

    GET IT RIGHT

  2. Harmony Hunter  

    I'm going to be harmony for the birthday of halloween

    Anyone have any tips on what harmony looks like and how to get there? by the way it's not just for myself because my friend is definitely trapped there and needs my help.

  3. Harmony Hunter Hunter  

    does anyone know where I can find harmony hunter? we have an axe to grind if you know what I mean.

  4. Harmony Hunter  

    my IP address changes because I am moving around a lot trying to find Harmony.

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