Mar

6

From the Issue: Eve to Adam

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Be on the lookout for the February issue of The Blue & White, coming to campus this week. In the meantime, Bwog will again honor our heritage/amorous affair with our mother magazine by posting features from the upcoming issue. Such treats include a visit to the Lamont-Doherty Earth Observatory, an investigation into Columbia’s animal testing practices, and the first part of a discussion on The Columbia School. Below, metalhead Jed Bush sets out to solve the mystery of those flyers scattered around Westside urging you to buy concert tickets.

illustration

Illustration by Adela Yawitz, CC '12

Upon entering Westside Market, posters for Eve to Adam, an “anthemic, guitar-driven rock band,” flank patrons on both sides. Ian Joskowitz, Westside manager, will shamelessly promote their music to anyone that will listen. With a dorky name and decidedly un-hip genre, one wouldn’t expect them to be on the edge of stardom, yet they boast 30,000 Facebook fans and are ranked 26th on the Mainstream Rock Chart. Their lead single “Run Your Mouth” channels an edgier, sleazier, bygone era of rock dominated by the likes of Guns N’ Roses and Van Halen. More impressively, the music video features everyone’s favorite Law and Order captain, Donald Cragen (played by Dann Florek). Oddly, the transformation of Eve to Adam from neighborhood scrubs to a legitimate power in the surprisingly vibrant Morningside Heights hair metal scene hinged on their Westside connection.

When drummer Alex Sassaris started moonlighting as a bartender at Vareli, another eating establishment managed by Joskowitz, Eve to Adam got their unlikely break. As Joskowitz puts it, “He kept shoving his band’s CD in my face, and, after a couple months, I finally gave it a listen, and, who knew, it turned out to be really fucking good!” Despite having no
experience running a record label, Joskowitz and fellow Westside Market manager George Zoitas agreed to manage the band, forming their all-in-one label, management, and publicity company 3for5 Entertainment.

But locking down a management crew was just the first step. Shortly after that, Joskowitz remembers getting a call from Sassaris about a new sponsor. He agreed to meet this potential backer at the closest thing they had to an office—an unused register at Westside. To his bemusement, “the man I ended up meeting was just a coked-up scammer who was trying to get us to invest in some dead-end scheme. That was the kind of company these kids were attracting.”

Countless phone calls, text messages, and emails later, Eve to Adam secured a record deal with Universal, suddenly finding themselves touring with the likes of Daughtry and Mötley Crüe. Joskowitz’s latest coup for the band is securing the opening spot for “a big band on a big tour.” The details are still being finalized, and he’s reluctant to reveal this big band’s identity, but he solemnly promises, “If we get this, everyone will know about Eve to Adam.”

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1 Comment

  1. Anonymous  

    ACE OF CAKE

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