John Jay Descends into Anarchy
Written by Bwog Staff
John Jay let out a collective scream yesterday when housing announced that their elevator (cause of much strife) will not be fixed for another three to four weeks. Three. To. Four. Weeks. So, for all you JJ residents out there, that means another MONTH of twenty minute lines, cramming fifteen people into the elevator, and sweating while you walk up ten flights of stairs. If we take into account the fact that “three to four weeks” in Columbia-time actually means “never,” we predict that it will take no time at all for John Jay to start rioting. The original email, which urges residents to take the other elevator or the stairs for the time being (gee whiz that never occurred to anyone!), is below:
John Jay Residents,
Thank you for your patience as we work with Facilities to repair the south John Jay elevator. We realize that this is an inconvenience, and we want to keep you informed of the progress. After further evaluation by the elevator company, the repairs needed require elevator car 18 to be out of service for three to four additional weeks. Unfortunately, custom parts have to be manufactured to resolve the issue. We hear your concerns and are working closely with Facilities and the manufacturer to ensure that parts and repairs are completed as expediently as possible. We will continue to keep you informed of any changes in the expected service completion timeline.
In the interim please use the adjacent elevator, car (#17), or the stairs. Note that car (#17) is only traveling between floors 1 – 13 while repairs to car 18 are underway.
Ultimate rage-face via Shutterstock
Tags: columbia is falling apart, elevator elves, elevator elves you have abandoned us, gee thanks columbia, john jay elevator uprising 2013, rageface, soon we'll only have an intricate pulley system, taking the stairs is harrrrdddd