What LitHum Teaches You
Written by Bwog Staff
After reading this NYTimes article about literature teaching you social skills, Bwog
quickly brainstormed compiled through much effort the complete set of life-lessons first-years will glean from LitHum.
Iliad: Sometimes when people get angry they kill people.
Odyssey: Non cosi fan tutte.
Histories: People lie to make their stories better.
Oresteia: Systems of law are helpful.
Oedipus: Oedipus can’t see she’s just not the girl for him
Medea: Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Some actions have harsher opposite reactions.
Lysistrata: Men just want to fuck.
Symposium: Wine loosens lips.
Bible: People interpret things differently.
Aeneid: Nationalism, man.
Confessions: We’re all inherently greedy.
Inferno: Go to hell, asshole.
Decameron: People like having sex.
Montaigne: Go to a doctor when you’re sick.
King Lear: Sibling rivalry is real.
Don Quixote: Imagination is not real.
P&P: It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife. Similarly, it is a truth universally acknowledged that a single woman must be in want of a man in possession of a good fortune.
C&P: People will go way out of their way to justify their actions.
To the Lighthouse: Sometimes, you’re just a Q.
What Columbia students do every single day courtesy of Shutterstock