Dec

19

Senior Wisdom: Jess Levenson

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Name, Hometown, School: Jess Levenson, West Orange, NJ, Barnard

Claim to fame? Former Hillel Eboard member, sister of Sigma Delta Tau, Columbia cheerleader, self-proclaimed food studies major. Hosted Greek Beats this year. Won second place in last year’s Erotic Cake Competition.

Where are you going? To live with my parents in Jerz

Three things you learned at Columbia:

  1. you CAN go all of college without pulling an all-nighter
  2. befriending security guards and food service staff will enable you to survive college without a student ID
  3. talking about how busy and stressed you are is a guaranteed way to make everyone hate you. You can get work done without talking about.

Back in my day… Barnard students could have whoever they wanted to sleep over without magazines writing about the administration regulating students’ sex lives, more fraternities had brownstones than EC townhouses, dining halls didn’t tell you the nutritional information of their food, you didn’t need invitations to frat parties.

Justify your existence in 30 words or fewer: I went to cheer tryouts a year ago with only a smile and a cartwheel. I proved a Jewish girl with a dream can make it come true if you allow yourself to be vulnerable.

Write a CU Admirers post to anyone or anything at Columbia: Columbia lawns, thank you for providing me with a wonderful space to hear Snoop Dog/Lion and Macklemore, dance at the Red Bull Truck, smoke hookah, check out the topless track team, eat lunch, play football at 4 am, write final papers, and of course, get a tan. When one of you has a red flag, another has a green flag. I will always treasure the memories I made with you.

Would you rather give up oral sex or cheese? My friend told me this will be googleable so I’ll use this as an opportunity to tell you the best way to eat cheese: in your bed (shout out to Liz Lemon and her Night Cheese).

One thing to do before graduating: ask your professor for an extension. They usually say yes.

Any regrets? Let’s see: the freshman 15, only taking African Dance twice, not spending more time in my sorority house, wasting time waiting for a machine at Dodge, laughing at my friends when they ask if I want to go for a run with them, not going to happy hour more, only JUST discovering the Diana cafe pizzas, not taking advantage of Barnard Career Development, only building one snowman in the last 4 years, never taking a picture with the magnolia tree on Lehman Lawn, and of course, NSOP week. Smh.

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11 Comments

  1. THIS GIRL  

    is one of the most genuine, hilarious, and beautiful people on campus. We love you and will miss you!! From an alpha theta hugs to the max, can't wait for you to come back to bacchanal in the spring and christmas next fall.

  2. Anonymous

    any girl with a dream can make it come true

  3. weird

    ..any girl can make her dreams come true

    but props for 30 rock ref

  4. Anonymous

    This girl seems smart and put together.

  5. Marc Blumen

    Love how you posted this on your own wall and wrote "relevant". How modest.....

  6. Anonymous

    That was beautiful and funny, i greatly enjoyed reading it. To the haters, find another hobby than hating (no one cares).

  7. Anonymous

    How is this funny? Seriously, I can't figure it out.

  8. Thudy Thuit

    WOW I LOVE YOU

  9. CC

    "ask your professor for an extension. They usually say yes."

    Is this a Barnard thing?

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