We can’t stop. Bwog just keeps coming up with more brilliant ideas for where y’all can get intimate with your significant other on campus, and we think this one may be crossing the line the best one yet. Say a quick Hail Mary as a Bwogger explains why the St. Paul’s Chapel is the best place to get your consensual freak on.
If you, like me, spent your teen years listening to Andrea Gibson’s “How It Ends” as you drove around your boring/small/Walmart-is-practically-a-nightclub town because you didn’t have a date on prom night, have I got the place for you to get a hickey on your ass in the shape of Jesus’ palm: St. Paul’s Chapel.
Not only is the Crypt the place of very sexy Columbia Admirers escapades, it also houses the weekly meetings of The Blue and White, and if Tina Fey has taught me anything, it’s that knowledge is fucking hot. Don’t want to have icky basement sex under the greenish cast of fluorescent lights? Then there’s always the chapel itself!
Blasphemous, you say? Sacrilegious, even? Admittedly, you’re talking to the kid who got kicked out of church at eight, but (ignoring, as always, Augustine) sex positive Christians totally exist and you’ve got the added benefit of doing it in the same place you could later get married.
As you settle into one of the many hard-to-spot nooks and crannies (or just spread out on one of the long, hard pews), gaze in wonder above your beer-googles-made-you-hotter hookup’s head at the gorgeous architecture on the ceiling, the beautiful hanging chandeliers, and the intricate stained-glass windows. Best part is, there should already be some water handy for cleanup after you finish!