Apr

27

Was Rafael Ortiz’s Presence In Columbia Buy Sell Memes A Conspiracy For His CCSC Campaign?

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I spent way too much time making this

Rafael Ortiz, memer supreme, was recently elected as the Pre-Professional Representative of CCSC. We don’t know about you, but Daily Editor Youngweon Lee thinks this is…fishy. Here is her conspiracy theory.

Around the end of last semester, columbia buy sell memes was created by a group of edgy meme-y students. As it quickly became everyone’s new favorite method of procrastination, some memers started to stand out more than others, mostly for their prolific posts, sometimes funny, sometimes not. First it was Rasmi, then it was Rafael Ortiz. I don’t know why Rasmi just kinda stopped posting; he was funny. My personal opinion on Rafael’s memes is that they’re hit or miss, and mostly shitposts, but then again, that’s pretty much an exact description of my Bwog articles, so I can’t judge.

So everyone (including me) thought Rafael didn’t have a life outside of memes, but then he friended everyone in this school on Facebook and announced his CCSC campaign. I mean, like, what? Where did that come from? And he ran for pre-professional representative, of all things. Who even runs for that? Rafael Ortiz, that’s who. And he won.

Now, if you don’t see the obvious conspiracy that Rafael’s meme mind brewed up, you’re sheeple. When he saw Rasmi posting memes and getting hundreds of likes, he saw potential. Unbeknownst to most meme fans, Rafael was always a politically minded opportunist. He analyzed the types of memes that get the most likes and attention in the first month or two of columbia buy sell memes, and started churning out memes. This, to him, wasn’t a waste of time, because it was an investment for his political career.

Then, he started posting. And posting. And posting and posting. Refer to the collage above. That’s 7 memes by Rafael. I didn’t even have to scroll far to get that many screenshots. He made sure literally everyone in this school knew his name. Even if you’re not even in the Facebook group, you’re probably familiar with the name Rafael Ortiz. He became a meme. The same way PrezBo is kind of a meme.

So then he friended everyone. By everyone, I mean everyone. He even friended me. I’m sure a bunch of people were starstruck that this meme celebrity friended them, so of course everyone accepted. Unless they hate Rafael’s memes. In which case, I don’t really know what to say. And then Rafael ran for CCSC. For a really niche position that I didn’t even know existed. So what do you do when you’re voting, and you’re done voting for all your friends, and you come upon this position of pre-professional representative that you didn’t even know existed? You pick the person whose name you know: Rafael Ortiz. And he won, so he succeeded! He knew what he was doing all along!

Wake up, sheeple. Stop liking his memes. Get off Facebook. Go study for your finals. You don’t know what he’s gonna do next. Stop enabling him and his memes.

Meme Collage via Youngweon Lee

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5 Comments

  1. Rafael Ortiz  

    The office of Representative Ortiz has issued a statement in response to the allegations alleged by the alleging party of allegations:
    https://31.media.tumblr.com/bc6d674154e44861d010ee919512650e/tumblr_inline_ncvxu0WiWc1qb4idi.gif

  2. Anonymous  

    bruh rafael ortiz is a savage lmao^

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