If the “Euphoria” characters ever make it out of high school, what should they major in?

(Possible spoilers ahead!)

Rue – Neuroscience and Behavior 

By pursuing a major in Neuroscience and Behavior, Rue could study both clinical and abnormal psychology, as well as neuroscience, giving her a better understanding of the way people are wired. I feel like this would be of particular interest to her given her own mental health background. Also, learning how different chemicals can affect neural behavior, why people become addicted, and the ways in which one can essentially “rewire” their brain would be pretty relevant to her life.

Fezco – Chemistry 

Although I don’t recall ever seeing Fez in school, it’s clear that he definitely has a knack for understanding substances. He knows precisely what elements in which configurations produce particular effects which, essentially, is what chemistry is all about. He should probably work on applying himself more in the classroom, but I think he’d be a natural in lab. 

Ashtray – Financial Economics 

Although he’s definitely gotten into some sticky situations–like in the season two finale–Ash knows how to do business. He’s used to handling large sums of money and dealing with the complications involved. Thus, if he were to (miraculously) make it to college, Financial Econ would be right up his alley.

Lexi – Drama and Theater Arts  

Given her interest in screenwriting, I could definitely see Lexi taking on Drama and Theater Arts as a major. She has lots of experience with putting on plays and I think she would thrive in this setting at Columbia. That said, although it worked in high school, I’m not sure just reproducing the entirety of her own life for every single play or film is going to cut it in college.

Jules – Visual Arts

Jules is bold, creative, and inventive, and her fashion choices clearly demonstrate that. Although Columbia doesn’t have a department or major dedicated to fashion, I feel that Jules would do well in the Visual Arts program within the School of the Arts. She clearly appreciates all art forms, abstract design, and visual experimentation.

Maddy – Human Rights 

Maddy has a strong moral compass and always knows her right from wrong. She’s stubborn, determined, and relentless, and I think she’d do well pursuing a major in Human Rights. Although she can be argumentative, I think this is a quality that might even benefit a Human Rights major: she passionately holds everyone to the same standards of decency and integrity–even if they might be her best friend.

Cassie – Theater 

Cassie has a history of being dramatically inclined, and she’s had a lot experience with acting, so I could definitely see her majoring in Theater.

Kat – Political Science 

Kat is quite strong-minded. Like Maddy, she can be pretty unyielding when it comes to her values and desires. She is empathetic, confident, and assertive, which are all great qualities for a Poli Sci major to have. In addition, Kat advocates for female empowerment and sexual freedom.

Faye – Biology (as a pre-requisite for plastic surgery)

I have a feeling that Faye might appreciate the opportunity to bless others with prominent lips like her own by taking on a career as a plastic surgeon. In order to earn her medical degree, however, she would have to obtain a bachelor’s degree in Biology (or Chemistry or Physics) before going pre-med. 

Elliot – Music Composition or Theory

Elliot has a passion for singing and songwriting, so he would be a great fit in Columbia’s music department, studying either Music Composition or Music Theory. Plus, within this program, I think it would be a great idea for him to work on making his songs an appropriate length.  

Nate – Business Management 

I don’t think I have to explain this one.

Cal – Women’s and Gender Studies 

Nor this. 

genius via bwarchives