This is a periodic table of Columbia University, demonstrating all the elements that make up the Columbia University that we know and love, ranging from dorms to alumni to local businesses.

H – Hinkson
He – Help
Li – LitHum
Be – Beta
B – Butler
C – Columbia College
N – Nine Ways
O – Office hours
F – Fu Foundation
Ne – Nervous Breakdown
Na – Nasty Women
Mg – Make CU Great Again
Al – Adderall
Si – Sig Ep
P – Pulitzer
S – Snakes
Cl – Claremont
Ar – Amsterdam
K – Kerouac
Ca – Carman
Sc – Spec
Ti – Title IX
V – Valentini
Cr – Creative Writing
Mn – Moncler
Fe – Ferris
Co – Community
Ni – Not Interested
Cu – Columbia University
Zn – Ezra Koenig
Ga – Gulati
Ge – School of General Studies
As – Asexual
Se – Sex
Br – Barnard
Kr – Koronets
Rb – RBG
Sr – Srats
Y – Youngweon
Zr – Zora Neale Hurston
Nb – Nussbaum
Mo – Morton Williams
Tc – Teacher’s College
Ru – Russian Studies
Rh – Rhodes Scholar
Pd – PDA
Ag – Allen Ginsberg
Cd – Columbia Dining
In – International Students
Sb – Sad Boy
Te – 1020
I – ISSO
Xe – Well Woman
Cs – CS
Ba – Bacchanal
La – Lambda
Hf – Hamilton Fish
Ta – TAs
W – Wien
Re – Res Life
Os – Oscar S. Straus
Ir – Ira Milstein
Pt – Part-time Job
Au – Alumni
Hg – Hungarian
Tl – Tree Lighting
Pb – PrezBo
Bi – Bisexual
Po – Science-Po
Rn – Roone
Fr – FroSci
Ra – RAs
AC – Air Conditioning
Rf – Ref Room
Db – Mango DB
Sg – Sigma Frats
Bh – Bullshitted Homework
Hs – Housing
Mt – Mount Sinai
Ds – D Sig
Rg – Ruggles
Cn – Carman Noises
Nh – New Hampshire
Fl – Furnald
Mc – Mccain
Lv – Love
Ts – Tequila Shots
Og – Orgo Night

Ce – Core
Pr – Bacchanal’s (nonexistent) PR
Nd – Dante
Pm – “PM me”
Sm – BDSM
Eu – Eugene Lang
Gd – Graduation
Tb – Bwog TBTs
Dy – Dionysus
Ho – Housing
Er – CAVA
Tm – Tom’s
Yb – BYOB
Th – Thornton
Pa – Patroclus
U – Uris
Np – Not My President
Pu – Pupin
Am – Alma Mater
Cm – CUMB
Bk – Brooklyn
Cf – Carman Flu
Es – Eskimo Siblings
Fm – FML
Md – Mudd
No – NoCo
Lr – Lerner