Who said that you had to be cuffed to have fun at Tree Lighting? (read: society)

Let’s be real: tree lighting is really a litmus test of your relationship. If the person you’re not really seeing leaves your Facebook invite to tree lighting on seen, here are a list of alternative actions to engage in during one of Columbia’s best traditions:

– transfer
– go with a trash panda
– go in a disguise to avoid shame
– worry that one day one of the lights will overheat and burn down the trees, catching fire on your jacket and you die oops
-replace your friend that cancelled on you with a flask! Have a great time!
– sneak your way into a performing a capella group and find your belonging while humming, beatboxing, and belting carols
– roll your way across the lawns and become a literal snowball, enjoy the lights along with the complete winter experience
– invite your hot TA to go with you ;)
– curl up in a blanket in a cozy Hamilton classroom and enjoy the view from there
– screw college walk and step up to the big leagues, go see the Rockafeller tree instead
– stay home for fear of ensuing blindness, your eyes are too sensitive from all the reading you’ve had to do for the core and can’t handle ALL THOSE LIGHTS
– climb a college walk tree one hour before the ceremony and enjoy the tradition at its most Extreme
– spend hours agonizing over your decision to go or not to go. arrive ten minutes after the trees were lighted