Have you been paying attention to our advertisements recently?
We at Bwog promise (for now) that we have not sold out and used our website to promote another company’s product or service. HOWEVER, most of what we do promote outside the articles we publish daily is a service created and written by the Bwog Staff for all our lovely readers. Even our BwogLetter advertisement banners on the top of the screen and the side of the page were designed by Bwog Staff, but we did not monetize them at all, so we are 100% okay in this domain ethically-speaking! We at Bwog promise (for now) that we are not regularly trying to send you targeted advertising.
But we are going to blur the lines just a bit today. Just a smidge. This article is 100% an advertisement.
Have you or a loved one ever thought to yourself, “Wow, I sure wish I knew what happened on the Barnumbia (just roleplay with me here before you comment) campus the last week!” Or, “Wow, I wonder if there is any way to have someone on campus tell me what cool events I can attend next week, or if there’s a way for me to know which Bwog staffers to email for a potential news story!” Or maybe you and said loved one (again, roleplay before you comment) just want to see cool pictures, funny headlines, and what quirky word will stand for the “B” in “Bwog” this week. Maybe you just like getting emails from people!
Whatever the reason is, we won’t judge you for it, but we will certainly cater to as many of your needs as possible with our weekly newsletter, BwogLetter. If we’re going to sell out, we’re going to sell out for you!
If you subscribe to BwogLetter, you will receive a 100% free email every Sunday night for the entire school year (minus holidays, of course). In this incredible steal of a subscription package, you will receive:
- Weekly highlights of past Bwog articles
- Information and sign-up details for cool, hard-to-miss events before anyone else on campus, curated by our Staff
- Opportunities to interact with Bwog Staff and contribute to our developing news investigations
- Song recommendations, book recommendations, TV recommendations
- A creative demonstration of everything you can do with the Metropolitan Museum of Art’s Public Domain online library
- And much, much more!
See? That’s like, six bullet points, and the last point was intentionally left blank to keep up this air of mystery that entices the audience to invest in our product. Might I remind you that you will be getting this out of the goodness of Bwog’s hearts, and you need not pay anything to receive this important and life-saving resource! Again, BwogLetter (subscribe) is 1000% free-of-charge! That’s zero American dollars, zero euros, zero Argentine pesos, zero rupees, and zero yen.
Don’t believe me yet? Here are some testimonials about BwogLetter that might finally convince you to subscribe:
“I subscribed before the 2022-2023 season began, and I’ve been a lifelong member of this email subscription service. BwogLetter is written by the funniest, most intelligent news team the entire country has to offer!” – Student, CC ‘23
“I subscribed to BwogLetter to get the news about this week’s events before everyone else on campus, and that’s how I found out I was going to be coronated King of England!” – King Charles III of England
“Yeah, I had nothing to do Sunday night because I spent all weekend studying instead of going out and having fun, so BwogLetter’s a nice wind-down activity that connects me with the rest of campus in a meaningful way.” – Student, SEAS ‘25
“I’m Timothée Chalamet. Subscribe to BwogLetter.” – “Timothée Chalamet,” technically not CC ‘18
Whoa, Timothée, how did you get here?! Anyway, now that we have notoriety and fame, you should subscribe to our newsletter, BwogLetter, as soon as possible. Hurry up, though, the next edition is due to be published this Sunday night, September 17, so you absolutely do not want to miss it! Subscribe by clicking one of the many links in this article, or click the button at the top of the menu bar.
Thank you for your attention; now back to daily scheduled programming.
Do You Know That BwogLetter Is Free Because It Is via Victoria Borlando