An unofficial guide to the conversation you’ll have twelve times before you’ve unpacked.

If you’re a freshman wondering what a coffee chat is, imagine meeting someone for coffee, except the coffee is optional and the conversation may determine whether you get into a club. An older member asks about your interests, you ask about the club, and you both pretend you haven’t had a nearly identical conversation three times this week.

You’ll probably have your first one before you’ve learned which campus buildings connect underground. Columbia’s club recruitment season begins with interest meetings and application forms, then introduces the coffee chat: a supposedly casual way for members to get to know applicants. Soon, your calendar contains more invitations to “grab coffee” than you’ve received in your entire life.

The format sounds pleasant. Two people sit down, talk about a shared interest, and maybe actually become friends. Sometimes that happens! But when a chat is part of a selection process, “casual” starts doing a lot of work. You’re trying to seem enthusiastic without sounding rehearsed, knowledgeable without pretending you’ve been following the club since middle school, and relaxed while mentally checking whether “What made you join?” is a good question or the question everyone asks.

There’s also the question of what to wear. It’s coffee, so jeans seem fine. It’s an interview, so perhaps they aren’t. You settle on an outfit that says, “I happened to look like this while passing through,” despite having changed at least twice.

By the end of the week, you can describe your interests in a polished 45 seconds. You have a thoughtful answer to “Why this club?” for several clubs whose names are starting to blur together. You’ve learned to identify which café tables are occupied by people having ordinary conversations and which are hosting round three of recruitment.

It can feel absurd that you got into Columbia and now have to apply to hang out with other people who got into Columbia. Clubs have limited space and members’ time is finite, but that doesn’t make it any less strange to prepare a miniature personal pitch for the chance to join a group built around something you already love. For freshmen especially, these applications can make campus involvement feel like another admissions cycle, just with more iced lattes.

Still, the coffee chat itself isn’t the villain. At its best, it gives you a chance to ask what a club is actually like beyond its Instagram posts and recruitment slides. You can find out what members do on a Tuesday when nobody’s taking photos, whether newcomers get to contribute, and whether the person across from you seems like someone you’d want to spend two hours with in a meeting.

So, go to the chat. Ask the question you genuinely have, even if it isn’t impressively phrased. You are allowed to decide whether you like the club, too. And if you leave without a new membership offer, you may at least leave with a new acquaintance, a better sense of campus, or a coffee you didn’t have to pay for.

Assuming they offered to pay. That part, like everything else, is apparently up for evaluation.

Images via Bwarchives