Nov

16

Week in Review: Distressed Edition

Written by

Everyone’s upset and running amok.  Bwog covered it all.

The Ivy League is dismayed, and it’s our fault.  Lively prefers us over Yale, we virtually destroyed Brown’s virtual campus, and football actually tore up Cornell’s (actual?) football field.

Columbians are panicked; knives and germs are everywhere.  Someone was assaulted and someone was stabbed.  Public Safety moved in in time to see chubby freshmen experience this winter’s first plague.

PrezBo is upset because the economy’s messing with Manhattanville, the engineers are agitated because SEAS is really hard, and the committees are concerned because of changing gender patterns.

But on the upside, just another week and a half to Thanksgiving, Christmas has come early, and said related break is longer than usual.  Cheers!

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2 Comments

  1. what?  

    no more decapitated chicken??? no one even complained!!

  2. Hawkmadinejad  

    The picture made me too hungry. I attempted to attack Bwog's computer for an easy and delicious meal. They took it down to protect their precious technology.

    ALL HAIL THE INNER PRIMORDIAL BEAST!

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