Menu CATEGORIES

Connect with us

CATEGORIES Menu
Articles

I Had A Midterm On December Fucking 10th

Staff writer Jordan Merrill is angry.

The girl in this picture is thinking about professors who give midterms on December 10th

I want to make something very clear: I had a M-I-D-T-E-R-M on the last day of classes. It says so right on the syllabus, and it makes me question whether my professor knows what the word “midterm” actually meads. In Latin, “mid” roughly translates to “middle of the” and “term” translates to “fucking semester.” So why is it that this midterm is being held on the absolute LAST day of classes? Was the 3 hour final next week not enough?

I would maybe, possibly understand having a final on the last day of class so as to not have to take an exam after reading week. That’s fair, sort of. While inconvenient for almost every student who probably has, like, homework or a thesis or something going on now, I understand that professors who do this are not trying to crush the souls of every undergraduate they encounter. I’m not sure if I can say the same about my professor, though, who is giving us a final exam not even a week later.

When I complained about this ungodly midterm to my fellow Bwoggers, someone actually asked me if I was talking about the biology midterm. No…I was not. But this leads me to believe that there are actually multiple twisted individuals giving midterms to their students on December  10th.

To Professor [redacted] and all of the other monsters: why? Why are you doing this and why are you like this? Do you enjoy watching a room full of 200 disgusting freshmen cry? You know what- probably. You probably do. I cannot fathom why anyone would give a M I D T E R M on the last fucking day of classes. Perhaps you hate the environment and enjoy wasting paper. Maybe you were bribed by Satan himself. I have to assume that anyone giving a midterm in the middle of December enjoys eating razor blades for breakfast and fears nothing.

If Columbia were a retail clothing store, I would be calling the manager on these professors so fast. But alas, it is not. When I realized there is nothing I can do, I started progressing through the grieving process. At first I was in denial, thinking that this midterm could abso-fucking-lutely not be real. I was angry at my professor, and then at my own brain for being small and not telling me to study earlier. I began to bargain, allotting myself twitter time for every problem I went over. I got sad when I realized how hard [redacted]’s midterm is going to be. And one day, in the distant but promising future, I hope to reach acceptance. Maybe someday.

 

 

Write a comment

Your email address will not be published.

 

2 Comments

  • Every Pre-med required class says:

    @Every Pre-med required class “Hello, welcome to Advanced Bio-organic compound differentiation. The first midterm is at the end of this lecture. The second midterm is the Wednesday before Thanksgiving. The third midterm is the last day of classes. The final is December 23rd. Lab is 8:40 – 2 on Fridays. Piazza shitposting is 10% of your grade.”

  • Did you know says:

    @Did you know A white man discovered antibiotics?

  • Have Your Say

    Does anyone want to switch CC sections with me?

    View Results

    Loading ... Loading ...

    Favorite Comments

    It worked! (read more)
    New Semester, New Look!
    January 22, 2019
    Looks gay. (read more)
    New Semester, New Look!
    January 22, 2019

    Recent Comments

    It worked! (read more)
    New Semester, New Look!
    January 22, 2019
    Looks gay. (read more)
    New Semester, New Look!
    January 22, 2019
    That sounds like a delicious drink! Definitely, want to give this a try. cheers! (read more)
    Cooking With Bwog: Rum Punch
    January 19, 2019