Pour one out for any TA on campus today.

No one is coming.

Like, point blank. It’s just not gonna happen.

I hold office hours every Friday; I’m required (and happy!) to do so as a TA. I don’t tend to get huge crowds, because it’s basically the weekend, or because we assign problem sets on Thursdays so everyone’s still procrastinating. Still, I get a fairly steady stream most days.

Not today. Not this Friday. To anyone who, like me, is holding office hours the day before fall break, I say: bust out your headphones and Netflix, because no one is coming. They’ll be sleeping off their Halloween hangover, or flying back home, or getting day drunk, or painting their nails and watching the newest season of BoJack Horseman. They sure as hell won’t be coming to campus to ask questions about whatever-the-fuck, BECAUSE WE HAVE A FOUR-DAY BREAK. If anyone shows up to my office, I’m just gonna turn them away and tell them to go play a board game with a loved one. (Not really. But I’ll be really surprised.)

Also, my office is on HAMILTON’S 8TH FLOOR. Who’s gonna climb Columbia’s Everest just to ask me a question about linguistics??? Let’s be honest with ourselves, folks. C’mon.

Don’t do this by Pixabay via Pexels.