Might as well just go to Redbubble.

The list that everyone needed! Here are the worst items we could dig up at the Columbia Bookstore.

10. Cornell Teachers College Tee

Who decided on this color scheme? Were they thinking of the wrong New York Ivy? Who is buying this for $24.98?

9. Camo Beanie

It’s definitely not the worst, but just isn’t really the vibe. Perfect for hiding from your professors who cold-call.

8. Golden Lion Statue

This is awful, but it’s also great. For only $46.98, you can have this fake gold lion statue. Please don’t buy it, though.

7. Leather Binder

I SEE PEOPLE WITH THESE EVERYWHERE, AND I JUST LEARNED THEY’RE $40??? Hopefully, your grandparents bought them for you.

6. Cursed Crop Top

This shirt felt like it was made out of a rug. Why is the V-neck so wide? At least now I know when this school was founded!

5. Baby Polo Onesie

For only $32.98, you can have the most annoying-looking baby at daycare! Because what’s a child if not business casual? Act soon because, at the time of writing, these onesies are almost gone!

4. Gold Watch

So your watch just broke, and you’re looking for a replacement? You’re in luck! For a mere $209.98, you can be the proud owner of the Columbia University CSI Men’s Watch Link Bracelet! But act quickly—at the time of writing, there are only three majestic watches left!

3. Golf Binder

Honestly, this might be the best item in the store. Especially because of how well-known we are for golf.

2. Haunted Mannequin Child

I don’t even know what to say about this one. Is it for sale? How long has it been trapped here? If I say its name three times in front of a mirror, will it follow me home?

1. Custom Engraved Wooden Chair

If I ever see one of you own this, I’m dropping out. I can’t even find a price for it online, which makes me think it’s at least one million dollars. I wonder if it comes with the pedestal.

Merch photos via Bwog Staff