Barnard students: please let me wear sweatpants to class. I can’t wear something nice every day of my life.
I am sick of dressing nicely. When I was packing for college, my mom assured me that all I would need was a couple of pairs of sweatpants, a few pairs of leggings, and some t-shirts. She told me that no one ever wears “normal” clothes to college classes. Everyone just throws on an old pair of sweatpants and calls it good. No normal college student actually puts effort into their look. But we’re not normal college students—we go to Barnard, and she could not have been more wrong.
Every day at Barnard is like walking into a college version of NYFW which sounds nice until you are living it. I’m not saying that I don’t love admiring my classmate’s outfits—believe me, I do. It’s just so much work trying to keep up with them and I am falling behind. I mean, I’m from Kansas. That should tell you enough about the level of dressing up I’m used to. People in my class used to come to school in their farming gear and I’m not exaggerating in the slightest.
On Monday and Wednesday, I have yoga from 9 to 9:55 am and then sociology at 10:10, which means that I have no time to change between the two classes. The looks that I get when I walk into class in workout clothes are so humbling. Even the teacher has an amazing fashion sense! One time she showed up in this adorable pair of boots and I still haven’t gotten over them. My friends are coming to class in almost runway-ready outfits every day while I try and shrink into a corner and make my outfit invisible. Like, I am so happy that my classmates are expressing themselves, but I absolutely cannot keep up with them. Getting out of bed to be in class by 9 am is hard enough; I physically cannot continue to put 45 minutes each morning into trying to come up with an outfit that seems at least somewhat suitable for the Barnard community.
I write all of this to say: please, Barnard Baddies, let me have a sweatpants day. I can’t do this anymore. My sweatpants are lying untouched at the bottom of my drawer, while my Doc Martens and off-brand Coach belt have been used almost every day. I’m running out of options here. You know that whole “fake it till you make it” saying? Well, I keep faking it and I’m still not making it.
I suggest that we make one day per week Sweatpants Day. The Barnard Baddies can have every other day, just give me one where I can put zero effort into my outfit. Maybe it can be every Tuesday. No one cares about Tuesday. Who’s even doing anything important on a Tuesday? Why do I have to dress up on a Tuesday? Out of every day of the week, Tuesday gives off the most Sweatpants Day vibes. Is there a point in one’s Barnard career where they learn how to effortlessly dress like they own a successful business while simultaneously looking like they’re going to a picnic with some woodland creatures, but only after they swing by an 80s alternative rock band concert? Is this a graduation requirement that I’m not aware of?
Anyway, according to Google, National Sweatpants Day is January 21. I say we make that a national holiday.
Image via Bwog Archives