Waldo frat anyone?

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Sofia Z. Whetstone, Barnard College, Film Studies, New England

Claim to fame: Being the first girl let in and then kicked out of Waldo Frat.

Where are you going? Back to Plornock, USA (or back to Waldo Frat disguised as a freshman boy to try to re-rush fall, 2024).

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the class of 2028?

  1. We have a non-zero chance of waking up on the moon tomorrow.
  2. Chowdah Sketch Comedy is really nice.
  3. Go to President Grant’s tomb. Open the lid and you will find that he was buried holding a teeny tiny marble.

“Back in my day….” The world was in black and white. I remember when gray was invented… Everyone was super excited! My favorite was when beige came out because bread is really pretty. I love life.

Favorite Columbia controversy? I don’t have a favorite, but my two least favorite are: Waldo Frat’s reinstatement and The Manhattan Project.

What was your favorite class at Columbia? Film Noir with Professor Schamus 

Would you rather give up oral sex or cheese? You have two ropes coated in oil to help them burn. Each rope will take exactly 1 hour to burn all the way through. However, the ropes do not burn at constant rates—there are spots where they burn a little faster and spots where they burn a little slower, but it always takes 1 hour to finish the job. With a lighter to ignite the ropes, how can you measure exactly 45 minutes? (a favorite riddle of mine pasted from Popular Mechanics)

Whom would you like to thank? Maxito, my parents, Hazel, Cousin Otis, my entire extended family from Vermont to Venezuela, the Fellas, Rosie, Ella, Arielle, Ellie, Izzie, Grey, Owen, Lex, Amandine, Otis Cat, and Alex Trebek.

One thing to do before graduating: Movie Night, every Tuesday at 8—write me for the location. 

Any regrets? Leaving Plornock in the first place…

Sofia via Sofia