Classic Canada Goose:

You probably begged your parents for this when you were 15 and you’ve worn it ever since. Basic, but rich basic.

Canada Goose Black Label:

You’re trying to be lowkey, but you’re not-so-secretly hoping that everyone still notices that you’re wearing a Canada Goose.

Classic Moncler: 

This jacket is everything to you. You probably think you’re classier than Canada Goose wearers, but in reality you’re just as basic. This time wealthy basic, because money talks and wealth whispers, only you’re whispering the Moncler logo.

Flamboyant Moncler: 

This is the exact opposite of the Canada Goose Black Label. You’re screaming daddy’s money and that beach house in the Hamptons.

Patagonia:

You’re super outdoorsy and you always want to be skiing in Aspen.

Arc’teryx:

The new and hip version of Patagonia. Only, you don’t actually leave the city.

Aritzia Superpuff:

You definitely spend all your money at Aritzia and you’re absolutely devastated that the Soho store’s cafe no longer has free drinks.

North Face Puffer:

This is the equivalent of wearing Dior Sauvage. There’s nothing that gives fuck boy more.

Long North Face:

Your mom got this for you in middle school in your suburban home where you matched everyone else.

Carhartt: 

You thrifted this in Brooklyn and you definitely want to move to Williamsburg after graduating. Also very likely that you also wear a beanie that’s about to fall off your head at the same time.

Columbia (brand): 

You got this when you were 13 and you don’t care about how you present yourself publicly.

Columbia Athletics:

You’re an athlete and you own it, despite your reputation at our school.

Overcoat:

You clearly value fashion over practicality. Oh, and how is recruiting for Goldman Sachs and McKinsey going?

No jacket:

You’re really not cold, right? Really, really not cold. Maybe if we say enough really’s, you’ll start to believe it.