Staff Writer Grace Novarr is here to remind you that you aren’t just a name! Here are some tips to truly stand out from the crowd.

In the beginning of the year, I began to notice the Barnard 2024 Facebook group slowly fill up with introduction posts by many, many people named Grace. It seemed like every other notification that popped onto my phone screen was alerting me of the presence of another Grace in the class! Then my suspicions were confirmed. During the freshman class commencement speech, one of the deans read a list of statistics about our student body and uttered the following fateful sentence: “The most common name in this class is …” As she paused, I knew with certainty what she was about to say. “Grace,” she finished, smiling benignly as if she hadn’t just confirmed my worst fears. My apprehension grew.

 I began to read over my own introduction post, wondering if it stood out from the mass. If anyone reading it would ever be able to remember which Grace I was if they ever wanted to contact me. It’s already hard enough to maintain one’s sense of self during a year in which we’re all just boxes on Zoom. But it’s even harder when at least three of those boxes, in each one of my classes, displays the name “Grace.” When the professors call on one of us, they often don’t clarify which one, which leads to a staredown from which only one dominant Grace can emerge, articulating the insightful point that earns the professor’s recognition. The rest of the Graces are left in the dust.

Because of this existential struggle, I decided to compile a list of ways for myself and the other Graces who may be reading this to hold onto our identities. Some of them I’ve personally tried, while some of them constitute depths that I’ve yet to stoop to, but hey, you never know where life will take you.

1. Develop an unmistakable social media presence. I like to do this by Tweeting every single thought I have, such that my audience feels so intimately entwined with my psyche that they would never mistake me for another Grace. I also constantly take and post selfies–to Instagram, Twitter, and sometimes even Tumblr, when I’m feeling truly desperate and anonymous so that my face is the one most predominantly associated with the name ‘Grace.’
2. Curate an individualistic sense of style. This one also doubles as a tip for how to motivate yourself to keep your camera on during class–knowing that I put over an hour into my outfit and makeup makes me want to remain visible for the entire time. Recently, I’ve tried out a goth aesthetic–fishnet arm warmers, fishnet leg warmers, and fishnet hair accessories, as well as black lipstick and heavy eyeliner–so that people will know that I’m the Goth Grace. It’s starting to get a little itchy, though, so I may soon switch over to a summery, picnicky aesthetic and be known as the Gingham Grace. Basically, the goal is to become Instantly Recognizable–to never provoke the question, “Which Grace are you?”
3. Stand out academically in your classes! This is one of the tips I haven’t personally tried out yet. The logic behind it is sound: if you’re on top of the coursework and participation, everyone will know who you are! Another Grace who doesn’t have social anxiety should totally try this one out and let me know how it works for them.
4. Incite a campus controversy. This is one I’m looking to do–a surefire way to guarantee that everyone knows which Grace I am. What should I do? Publish a bad take in a Spec op-ed? Publicly avow that I don’t like Vampire Weekend? Like an inflammatory Columbia Confessions post? Feel free to leave me a suggestion! 
5. Go by your middle name. I won’t do this, but someone whose middle name isn’t one letter off from their ex’s first name should!

Okay, so maybe it’s not that deep. There are other common names besides Grace, after all–in fact, Grace was only the 15th most popular baby name of 2002! To slightly modify the speech given by Wreck-It Ralph in the eponymous 2012 movie, “I’m Grace–and that’s good. I will never not be named Grace, and that’s not bad. There is no one I would rather be than me!”

The Three Graces via Wikimedia Commons