The Lions asked Victory to be their Valentine… and they said yes!

Chinese politics, DoorDash laws, and more below.

Ever wondered why coaches are always holding up giant cards with emojis on them?

Columbia defeats Cornell, 91-58, winning their third consecutive and first outright Ivy League Regular Season championship.

We now know what a three-pointer is! GO LIONS!!

The Lions, led by Riley Weiss (CC ‘27), have secured the No. 1 spot in the Ivy League Standings.

We LOVE Women’s Basketball!!

I think this is actually the only basketball coverage that matters.

This is our new album, “The Tortured Sports Poets Department.”

The Lions are still alive.

The Lions mounted a double-digit comeback against Cornell, earning a 69–64 victory in an overtime thriller on Senior Day. With the win, the Lions secured a share of the Ivy League Championship with Princeton.

Elon Musk musks, again.

She’s back and just as… Elizabeth Holmes as always! Editor’s note: Article contains mentions of violence.

The Lions faced a tough challenge when SEC opponent Vanderbilt came to town. The Commodores pulled away in the fourth quarter to top Columbia 74–63.

If you’re looking for actual coverage of Saturday’s Columbia vs. Brown women’s basketball game, do not click on this.