Written by Lexie Lehmann
Bucket List represents the intellectual privilege we enjoy as Columbia students. We do our very best to bring to your attention important guest lecturers and special events on campus. Our recommendations for this week are below, and the full list is after the jump. If you notice any events that have been left off the list, or if you have a correction, please let us know in the comments.
Written by Senior Wisdom
You asked, and we delivered: up next on our first day of senior wisdoms is the wonder Poke-Master Karim Nader, who tells us about Metaphysics and his EC PJ party plans.
Name, School, Major, Hometown: Karim (Cream Cheese without the Cheese), Columbia College, Philosophy with a concentration in Math, from Beirut, Lebanon.
Claim to fame: That guy who decides how much money your group is getting, Carman mom, wrote for Spec, might have asked you about your sex life if you’ve gotten an HIV test at Health Services.
Where are you going? I’m working as a paralegal for a law firm in midtown, moving to a cute Astoria townhouse and living the suburban mom dream in NYC.
What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2021?
1) Learn to love Columbia: You’re spending the next few years here and it is easy to end up hating your time at Columbia by looking at everything the school does negatively. Focus on the progress the school is doing, find the administrators that want to make this place better, find classes that you will enjoy, activities that you are passionate about. You’re the one who gets to make this experience a positive one.
Tags: can we come to ur pj party, furnald uncle, go watch varzi's video on holes and die happy, gotta catch em all, hartley step sister, hi we love philosophy majors, it's drake, love yourself know your worth -- drake (or gandhi?), senior wisdom, thanks carman mom yes i grabbed a jacket, we can catch some of them, whos the john jay dad
Written by Senior Wisdom
It’s everybody’s favorite time of year: Senior Wisdom season. The season when, instead of being rained on by water, you’re rained on by the witty and wise words of Columbia’s graduating class. Our first wisdom this year is from Alex Della Santina, former poet of the marching band, Spec columnist, and resident of a destroyed EC suite (yeah, that one).
Name, School, Major, Hometown: Alexandra Marie Della Santina, SEAS, Electrical Engineering, Towson, MD (same place as Michael Phelps. For a brief period between the Athens Olympics and the Phelps bong hit scandal, my high school address was 69 Michael Phelps Way.)
Claim to fame: This is a tricky one. Before Bored@Butler was deactivated, my claim to fame was that there was a whole thread devoted to whether I was really attractive or ugly enough to make people want to transfer schools. There was no in between. Now all I’ve got is while performing Orgo Night Spring 2016, a guy in a Charmander onesie holding a boombox started to heckle me and I yelled at him. Because of that, Spec referred to me as the “CUMB Queen”. Still don’t know how they learned my old summer camp nickname.
Where are you going? Moving from NY to Philadelphia as part of my goal to live Tina Fey’s life in reverse. As a side project, I’ll be building helicopters with Boeing.
Written by Bella Tincher
This past Saturday night, Bwogger, Bella Tincher, decided to venture down to Riverside Theater to see the Columbia University Ballet Ensemble’ production of Sleeping Beauty. Filled with strife, drama, and comedy, the show was quite a delight.
As I filled into my seat, third row from the front, I was excited to see what waiting for the audience on the other side of the curtain. The theater had a very basement-of-the-church feel, even equipped with that musky smell that old buildings always seem to have.
The show started with an introduction from the executive director and artistic director, Elizabeth McAneny (BC ’18) and Elizabeth Neureiter (BC ’18), respectively. They spoke passionately about their show, obviously taking great pride in their work, with Neureiter having her hair slicked back in a bun and ready to perform in minutes. With that the show began, a prologue that consisted of the icon scene of whether to give Aurora (played by Clara Monk, CC ’20) a purple or pink dress. The antics of the court was funny, if not a little slapstick-y, full of overdramatized fights and gestures to get their message across to the audience of what was happening if they weren’t already familiar with the storyline. Read more about this beautiful production after the jump!
Written by Timmy Wu
As finals season slowly creeps in, it’s difficult to keep track of anything. Exactly how much did you sleep yesterday? Have you eaten at all? How many friends do you still have left? While we have been imparting priceless wisdom to the hopeless masses of Morningside Heights, you would think Bwog has its shit together…but we have our personal vices, too. Yes, we teach you all the necessary skills to survive college or recreationally pseudo-reproduce, but we, too, are subject to mundane affairs of the masses. If you are so inclined to find out who exactly still has the time to write for Bwog, or if you personally want to be the person who courageously writes for Bwog during finals week, come to Lerner 505, at 7 pm today. We will reward you with a Fuck Spec sticker.
Written by Timmy Wu
Happening in the world: As a result of the failed coup last year, Turkish government sacks about 4000 government officials, including “1000 justice ministry workers, a similar number of army staff and more than 100 air force pilots.” (BBC)
Happening in the nation: After spending more than two years in detention, an American businesswoman, Sandy Phan-Gillis, who was convicted of spying by China, and sentenced to three and a half years in prison on Tuesday is not back in the US. (BBC)
Happening in NYC: Trump revealed in a Fox News interview that he has not returned to New York City because “going back is very expensive” and that he feels “guilty”. (NYPost)
Happening on Campus: Yuhong Li, a filmmaker of a documentary project “Family Album: 100 Chinese Family Stories Uncovered”, started by students of the University in Hong Kong will be at Columbia on May 1 to screen four films, the description of which can be found in here.
Feeling down because of finals? Here is a baby sloth to cheer you up.
image from Creepy Gift Shop
Culinarily, uptown Manhattan is a part of New York that is often unfairly overlooked. We asked our staff for their favorite restaurants above 120th Street, which serve delicious meals ranging from southern comfort to Shanghainese soup dumplings. Next time you head uptown, try out some of our suggestions!
La Salle Dumpling Room
Known for: Shanghainese soup dumplings, rice cakes, Shanghainese fare
Location: La Salle and Broadway
Known for: Sunday brunch, chicken and waffles, southern classics
Location: 126th and Malcolm X Blvd
Known for: Authentic Mexican food (that’s right Californians!), amazing sangrias and margaritas
Location: Broadway between La Salle and Tiemann Place
The Handpulled Noodle
Known for: Chinese noodles (dry and soup options), great vegetarian options, northern/western Chinese fare
Location: 148th and Broadway
Known for: Breakfast, brunch, southern classics (fried chicken & biscuits)
Location: 123rd and Amsterdam
Known for: Vegetarian and meat curries, roti, rice bowls, great Indian food
Location: Broadway between La Salle and Tiemann Place
Known for: Ramen (especially the Tonkatsu apparently)
Location: Tiemann Place and Broadway
Known for: Fresh Italian food in a cozy setting
Location: La Salle and Claremont Ave
images via morningside-alliance.org and foursquare
Written by Mia Lindheimer
Your Senior Night plans are cancelled. Bernheim and Schwartz will close its doors indefinitely tomorrow, April 30, 2017, after just three years in Morningside Heights. Despite serving only a short tenure on campus, Bernheim had established itself as many seniors’ weekly Wednesday night plans, a decent place for a giant pretzel, and a hard-ass on fakes. We wonder what freshmen will do now that they won’t be receiving a free Bernheim bottle opener in their NSOP goodie bags.
After hearing a rumor from a friend of Bwog, we gave Bernheim a call to confirm. Though Bernheim & Schwartz won’t be open for a beer anymore, their catering business will continue to operate. When Bernheim moved in during 2014, they replaced Havana Central. Naturally, we’ve got to wonder just who will be replacing Bernheim (and if anyone will be replacing Bernheim; how much space does a catering business take up?) We’re sort of sad to see them go, but also hopeful that the replacement will provide us with a new Wednesday night tradition. RIP BoSchwo.
Written by Betsy Ladyzhets
What better way to recover from V-123 than to go see even more student theater? That’s what Managing Editor Betsy Ladyzhets did last night, when she attended the King’s Crown Shakespeare Troupe’s midnight show (a.k.a. “drunk show”) of As You Like It. The production has one more show, which starts tonight at 8 pm on Pupin Plaza and has free admission.
I arrived at Pupin Plaza around ten minutes to midnight yesterday to watch KCST’s production of As You Like It expecting two things: first, to enjoy an engaging performance of a Shakespearean comedy, and second, to be unable to hear or understand half of the scenes. The first of these expectations was well met, and the second completely blown out of the water – even at a performance attended by around 150 people, many of whom were drunk. KCST delivered a show that was expert in its acting, yet fully accessible to its audience, and that submersed anyone watching completely into a fictional world where sins are forgiven, mistakes repaired, and love the highest law.
As You Like It is a romantic drama under the guise of a political drama. It follows two young nobles, Rosalind and Orlando, as they are banished from the courts of Duke Frederick (Rosalind’s uncle) and Oliver (Orlando’s brother), respectively, and find solace in the forest of Arden. In this forest, between shenanigans with shepherds and nobles alike, Rosalind tests Orlando’s professed love her by disguising herself as a man and attempting to berate him out of his affections. The play ends with not one, not two, but four weddings.
Tags: arts review, betsy procrastinated on writing this review by reading everyone's program bios, bwog loves shakespeare's dick jokes, drunk show = best show, kcst, shakespeare, shout-out to the kcst program for putting everyone's class and year next to their bios!! wish all shows did that!!!!, we really wanted one of those s'mores from the campfire scene though, when will kcst do a show on barnard's campus? (just kidding we know dean hinkson would never let them)
No matter what Columbia undergrad (or grad?) school you’re in, you most definitely have had experience trying to get an EC sign-in, either for yourself or a friend. (If you’re a grad student trying to get signed into an EC party…..wyd.) We compiled a handy list of strategies below for you to get effectively and efficiently signed into EC so you can enjoy those sweaty parties that never have enough alcohol to make it worth it.
The Columbia/Barnard science community is blessed with countless lab research opportunities. Here, a first-year undergraduate researcher documents his experiences with a sonnet. He would like to preface this poem by stating that STEM, and not creative writing, is his forte.
You send out emails left and right:
“Please won’t you have me in your lab?”
Professors ghost you; you really hang tight,
And finally get invited to do research that’s fab!
You don’t know how to use a pipette,
All the PCR results that you get are crap.
You might as well get your data from playing roulette,
Why beat the learning curve if you can take a nap?
Your graduate mentor has the patience of a saint,
Now your gel electrophoresis doesn’t look so sad.
You read papers, review textbooks, and finally get trained,
You’re getting the hang of this – hey this isn’t so bad!
If you like science, join a lab – it’ll be neat!
You might publish a paper one day – now that’s a feat!
bio meme via the facebook group: High Recombination Frequency Biology Memes
Tags: all that orgo wasn't just made up, at least it rhymes, if i had a nickel for everytime my pipette tip didn't fit into my pipette i could afford to pay full tuition at columbia, ok but is it sterile?, pulitzer worthy poetry, true doubt is forgetting whether or not all the reagents were added to the PCR
Written by Alex Tang
Happening in the United States: President Trump failed to repeal Obamacare within his first 100 days in office, as he originally promised, when House Republicans were unable to draw enough votes. (The New York Times)
Happening in New York City: Amtrak plans to undergo major repair work at Penn Station this summer to fix the station’s crumbling 40-year-old infrastructure. Expect major delays at Penn Station in the next few months. (CBS New York)
Happening on Campus: Go see the 123rd Annual Varsity Show tonight at 8pm! Tickets start at $8.50.
Overheard: “I don’t want to be pre-med anymore. I want to be pre-sugar baby.”
Study Tip: Studying for finals? Listen to some Mozart! Classical music has been shown to reduce stress, among other benefits.
As is customary, Bwog sent its Arts Editor to opening night of the Varsity Show in order to catch the scoop and write the show’s first review. This year, freshly minted Arts Editor Sarah Kinney was up for the challenge. Here is Bwog’s comprehensive review of the 123rd Annual Varsity Show, representing the compiled views of all Bwog staffers (as well as some of Kinney’s personal thoughts).
While waiting in the will-call line for the 123rd Annual Varsity Show outside of Lerner on Broadway, Debora Spar herself walked up to chat with the woman in line right in front of me. I turned around to my fellow Bwoggers in shock. “Holy shit,” I said to them, all of us murmuring and slyly taking photos. “That’s DSpar.” It was in that moment I knew I was in for quite the evening.
This year’s Varsity Show, A Tale of Two Colleges, was co-written by Amelia Arnold (BC ’17) and Mark Lerner (CC ’18), directed by Kyle Marshall (CC ’17), and produced by Rachel Andrews (BC ’19) and Alana Koenig (BC ’18). The Broadway-style music was composed by Simon Broucke (CC ’19) and Max Gumbel (CC ’18) and the moves were choreographed by Annie Block (CC ’19). As I settled into my fancy third row press seat, I looked up and realized—for the second time in the past ten minutes—that Debora Spar was right in front of me, sitting front and center in the very first row. The lights dimmed, and the show began.
Tags: " this could go a million different ways i guess we'll just see, "i only shop at Saks, 123rd annual varsity show, a tale of two colleges, all the one liners were seriously so fucking hilarious, DSpar, dspar is so extra yikes, Goldberg, gr8 job everyone really, i put more work into this review than i have into any of my finals so far, read Bwog, tom's, varsity show, XOXO
Written by Amara Banks
Ever since the ban/relocation of the Columbia University Marching Band’s Orgo Night, there has been a series of mishaps and miscommunication on the part of the Columbia administration. Bwogger Amara Banks calls them out on their fake love.
Since last semester, a collection of frustrated Columbia University Marching Band alumni has penned a total of 10 defenses of Orgo Night. Created in the style of pamphlets, the group desired to express their disagreement and frustration with the tradition’s cancellation.
After its 10th publication on March 26th, a letter addressed to President Bollinger (and emailed to several other campus administrators, including Ann Thronton and Deantini) essentially asked, “What’s the deal?” Their letter opens with a summary of the group’s communications with the university—emails and letter sent to him, Thornton and Valentini. According to Hamiltonius, the administration’s response has consistently been: “The University administration knows best and that no action will be taken in response to alumni concerns.”
The group began drafting and publishing pamphlets in another attempt to start conversation with the administration, sending the essays both via email and snail. The letter included a summary of the conflict and their frustration before ultimately calling for a response:
“Where do we go from here? We are alumni who love Columbia, who actively participate in alumni events and reunions, who return to Columbia for homecoming and Days on Campus, who interview high school students for the Admissions Office, and who attend athletic events to cheer on our Lions… What do we want? We want you and Dean Valentini to stop ignoring us and putting us off with platitudes and form letters.”
When we listlessly sit in lecture, we tend to do various things — sleep, doodle, viciously glare at others, noisily eat some concoction inevitably involving peanut butter, and write some shit in our notes. As we look at our notes for the first time during Reading Week, let’s commemorate our recorded moments of triumph, despair, surprise, and resignation.
Notes via Betsy Ladyzhets
© 2006-2015 Blue and White Publishing Inc.