Written by Victoria Arancio
Last week, many members of the Bwog staff drowned in midterms. If you are a student that wishes to reach out to our fallen members, join us in a seance with our medium: chocolate covered pretzels. In order to move on from this painful incident, bring ideas and pitches to help the spirits cross over. Don’t worry about being scared, the spirits are basically as chill as Casper the Friendly Ghost.
The Bwog staff was last seen alive Sunday at 7 in Lerner 505. Come join the spirits this week if you dare…
Be in touch with Bwog’s ghostly past via Pinterest
Written by Asya Sagnak
The month might be nearly over, but Bwog isn’t done dishing out campus horror stories! This time, Senior Staff Writer and midterm victim Asya Sagnak expands upon an unexpected experience in Columbia’s favorite prison/library.
The clock strikes eleven. That marks your eleventh hour at Butler, desperately trying to save your GPA. You’re desperate, tired, and sad. The people around you are even worse – one girl has a rice cooker going, and multiple people seem to have just moved in.
Your head starts to spin, letting you know that you’re probably lacking fresh oxygen. You might be planning on spending the rest of your life in those dusty stacks, but your body seems to disagree. You check your progress – you could probably spare a minute to (literally) breathe.
You’re on your way out as you feel a hand on your shoulder. It’s a man, and he’s trying to talk to you. What’s he saying? You’re not sure – it’s been awhile since you’ve had human contact, and you might have forgotten to process language. He finishes what he’s saying and looks at you with an expectant smile.
“So… Can I have your number?”
AT&T made a deal to buy Time Warner for $84.5 billion yesterday. The companies expect to finalize the deal by the end of 2017. Trump commented that because of his view on the consolidation of major media companies, he wouldn’t have approved the deal. (The Wall Street Journal)
Major websites such as Twitter, Airbnb, Spotify and Netlix were hacked. The hack used other internet dependent devices without the consent of the private owners and created major internet traffic. U.S. Homeland Security is currently investigating this latest attack. (New York Times)
A woman smeared thirty cars with peanut butter on what she thought were cars of Trump supporters. It turns out that they were part of the Tomorrow River Conservation Club. Officials found the woman intoxicated and licking her fingers. (Huffington Post)
25 people were harmed in a chemical incident in the London City Airport. Over 500 people were evacuated as several passengers began to feel ill. Discovered to be due to gas spray, investigators are looking into the potential causes of the accident. (Buzzfeed)
All of your buttery needs via The Huffington Post
Written by Amara Banks
With midterms making us sometimes feel we are surrounded by grade-obsessed zombies, it can be difficult to remember our student body is filled with incredible people using their talent to help others. Peter Kiernan represents a perfect example of the reminder we need.
In 22 days, the fate of our country will be decided through the selection of our next President. Regardless of which candidate you support, we can agree both have made questionable mistakes. GS student and former U.S. Marine Peter Kiernan has focused on Donald Trump’s mistake of withholding his tax returns, but instead of bashing him on Twitter and over dinner with friends like the average student, he has turned his frustration into a challenge to the Republican nominee. Through Crowdpac, an online fundraising website for users to support politicians or specific initiatives, Peter has asked anyone to pledge whatever they can to his fund supporting ten different veteran organizations, however they will only have to honor their contribution if Trump releases his tax returns. LinkedIn co-founder Reid Hoffman saw the brilliance in Peter’s fundraiser, and promised to match the campaign’s total by five times, not exceeding five million dollars.
Written by Gabrielle Kloppers
Happy Halloween Month! If you’re anything like Bwog, you’ll be noticing campus becoming ~spookier~ as Hallowen draws closer. Bwog Senior Staff Writer Gabrielle Kloppers recounts a very real, and very scary problem for Columbia students year round; the ever-present, ever-nosy, Suite Ghost.
Despite not living in the Ruggles Murder Suite, we are all nevertheless plagued by strange noises all times of the day and night. What is that noise? A rat? A ghost tapping at your windowpane? Your drunk suitemate swaying to the bathroom (on a Tuesday)? It is probably the latter, but your willingness to believe in the supernatural grows as you notice some strange inconsistencies around the Suite. Where did that jar of Nutella go? Surely you didn’t scrape out the final dregs. That’s not your spitty fingermarks on the edge of the jar. Where are the four bananas you stole from Ferris (karma is a bitch)?
At this moment, you begin to suspect some foul play afoot, and download an iPhone app that promises it will tell you if there’s a ghost around- and help you communicate with it. You’re a bit skeptical, until the app beeps that the electrochemical signals in the air (what does that mean?) indicate there’s a ghost, right behind you. Her name is Jane and her signal isn’t overly strong. Fuck you Jane, you think. Stop stealing MY Nutella, it is midterm season and the sugar is sorely needed.
Tags: a very scary halloween!, bitch better have my money, Bwog does spooky, bwog has a jar of nutella right now totally acceptable right, ghost pooper, healthy food, home suite home, natural sugar is a HOAX, nutella over everything, spooky, trans fats, we are lazy and a bagel with nutella is kind of the same thing as gourmet chocolate cake right?
Written by Gowan Moïse
New York City is packed with amazing culture and inspiring art, but sometimes it’s difficult to break the Morningside-bubble and experience it all first-hand. “Where Art Thou” is a weekly guide to interesting and notable lectures, events, and performances for the literary/musically/ theatrically-inclined on campus.
Tuesday, October 25th
Wednesday, October 26th
The European Space Agency stated that a European spacecraft, named “Schiaparelli” might have crashed on Mars on Friday, leaving a dark spot on Mars’ surface. (The New York Times)
Airbnb lost major lawsuit battle in New York State. Its Head of New York Public Policy, Josh Meltzer, wrote in a statement, “A majority of New Yorkers have embraced home sharing and we will continue to fight for a smart policy solution that works for the people, not the powerful.” (Buzzfeed)
Trump campaign makes a rare move against Michelle Obama, as Donald Trump digs up dirt from the past, citing the first lady’s 2008 remark: “If you can’t run your own house, you certainly can’t run the White House,” which may have been directed to Hilary Clinton. (CNN)
Worried about your bike being stolen? A new company has designed a U-shaped bicycle lock, aptly named “Skunklock”, that would release “noxious chemical” if someone tries to sever the lock. The theft-detering gas, as it claims, could cause “shortness of breathing” and impaired eyesight. (BBC)
photo via BBC
It was a dark and stormy midday on November 9th, 2016. The students of Professor Adelbert’s Soviet Interventions class slowly shuffled in, excitement in their eyes as they prepared for another lecture full of Russian mockery. Professor Adelbert started the day as any other, showing the class newly revealed records of old Soviet conversations during the World War II and Cold War eras. He went on to point out his own seminal theories of Soviet strategy, and mentioned that the Russian government continued to deny atrocities that historians attest did occur during those times. As usual, he gave the class a wink-and-smirk, pointing out that the Russian government would throw him in the modern equivalent of the gulag if they ever found out about his lectures.
Written by Jennifer Nugent
Student performance group NOMADS is presenting username, a production that centers around online gaming communities. username will be performed on October 20, 21, and 22 in the Glicker-Milstein theatre.
NOMADS performs works that are entirely student-generated. From the script, to the direction, to the sound design, this production was entirely created by your peers! In “username,” the audience glimpses into the life of someone who depends on online gaming communities for support while he struggles with relationships in his own life. Joey Santia has written a fantastic script, and director Leo Angulo has worked with the talented cast to bring each character to life. As millennials, this production is an important piece to see, as it poses difficult questions about the quality of our interactions. Toby, the main character, is a closeted teen in love with his best friend, who discovers gaming and becomes entranced with the life and characters he finds on the internet. Matt Taub captures Toby’s desires and insecurities perfectly and, from his stance to his facial ticks, fully inhabits the role.
Ah, love—how it comes and goes with the wind. We have a few tips to help you avoid the more tense moments in your lives.
mariah carey truism via Vanity Fair
At a Beijing economic forum yesterday, President Rodrigo Duterte announced “my separation from the United States… both in military and economics also.” (Chicago Tribune)
Yesterday in Miami, President Obama compared the Affordable Care Act to Samsung. If a phone has flaws, he said, you fix it and don’t throw it away. “Unless it catches fire, then you pull it off the market,” Obama joked, alluding to recent Samsung Note 7 explosions. (CNET)
The lawyers of Artem Vaulin, the alleged head of KickassTorrents, recently issued their response to prosecutors’ allegations that Vaulin committed secondary criminal copyright infringement. They argued that secondary copyright infringement is a civil and not a criminal violation. (Ars Technica UK)
MetLife has recently abandoned Snoopy in favor of a “clean, modern” design that represents “life, renewal and energy.” Dean Crutchfield, an independent brand consultant, said, “Snoopy was brought in to connect emotionally with consumers. It is no longer relevant to its target audience.” (New York Times)
snoopy needs a hand to hold via New York Times
Written by Sarah Kinney
On Wednesday evening, first year staff writer Sarah Kinney traversed over to Schapiro Theatre (after going to the other Schapiro building and getting wicked lost) to see Columbia’s Graduate School of the Arts’ production of Summertime. She laughed, she cried… just like she did later that evening while watching the debate. But that’s another article. Back to the play.
Upon walking into the Schapiro Theatre black box on Wednesday night, I was confronted by a charming and intimate set. A pile of mattresses in one corner. A couch in another. A picnic table in the middle. But, most notable of all: rose petals, covering every inch of the stage floor. However, maybe stage isn’t quite the right word. The actors waltzed around in the middle of a high-ceilinged room, surrounded by clumps of chairs, some of which ascended into rows, some of which were courtside with the action itself. Shortly after I found my seat, the second row in a small group of six chairs, the lights dimmed. Showtime.
Written by Lexie Lehmann
In their first production of the fall semester, the Columbia University Players present Christopher Durang’s “Baby with the Bathwater,” a dark comedy about child-rearing, directed by Max Fiest CC ’17. Last night, Bwog newbie Lexie Lehmann had the chance to sit in on the play’s dress rehearsal. Below are some of her thoughts! (Content warnings for the show itself: child abuse, spousal abuse, sexual assault, and gender dysphoria)
The latest performance gracing the (limited) performance spaces of Columbia is CU Players’ “Baby with the Bathwater”: a hilarious play with a sinister twist about two hopeless parents raising their newborn child, Daisy. The parents, John and Helen, played by James Ritchie (CC’20) and Harrison Gale (BC’20) respectively, are a match made far from Heaven. Helen is a whiney, aspiring novelist while John is a charming alcoholic with childlike tendencies. And while the two frequently muse about wanting a divorce, they decide to stay together for the sake of their child.
To help with childcare, they hire a neurotic nanny, aptly named “Nanny”, played by Jennifer Yu (CC ’17). Nanny does little to help, and instead focuses her attention on seducing the naïve John. During the nighttime, a homeless, pregnant woman named Cynthia, played by Sarah Billings (BC ’18), breaks into the house to sing to Daisy. Upon discovering the woman, John and Helen decide to take her in. Now she, Nanny, and the two parents are forced to share a bed and to divide responsibility over taking care of Daisy — when truly, none of them are qualified.
Most of the play follows Daisy’s life through the perspective of the four whimsical characters raising her – until the second act, when Daisy appears as a grown adult, played by Christopher Jackson (GS ’18)… and the full effects of being raised by deliriously unfit chaperones are revealed. Here, the play takes a dramatic and unexpected turn; Daisy is a boy who had been forced to conform to a feminine name and clothing because his parents ‘guessed wrong’ and never checked because they ‘didn’t want to intrude’. And now, he is horribly depressed, failing college, and a sex addict. Yikes.
Written by Ross Chapman
Today is Midterm Day, the halfway point in the semester. To mark the occasion, Bwogger Ross Chapman is here to remind you that your situation could always be worse – at least when today is over, it’s over!
Taylor Swift is the first person I hear in the morning. “The players gonna play, play, play,” she reminds me from my radio alarm as I push off the covers. 8:00 a.m. always feels too early for me, but I have to get ready. Two of my suitemates, however, are already up and about.
“Don’t forget your textbooks, ‘cause today’s a stressful one!”
“It’s always stressful, where are we, the situation room?” The espresso machine in their room seems to fuel their loud morning banter.
“But today’s especially important, you know why?”
“It’s Midterm Day!” they sing together excitedly as they put their bags together for breakfast.
Since we started living together sophomore year, my suitemates have been obsessed with Midterm Day. For some inexplicable reason, the academic calendar lists Thursday, October 20 as “Midterm Date,” the halfway point of the semester. We like to imagine that Columbia thinks that it’s the one day a year when we happily take all of our midterms. But for me… well, it feels true. I have three midterms today, starting at 8:40 and going straight through until 2:00. I brace for the hell that today will put me through.
To cut to the chase, the exams totally ruin me. While I do okay on the first one, I’m totally unprepared for the essay questions on the others. As I wonder how well I’ll have to do on the finals to make these grades up, my suitemates are in the middle of a celebration. Midterm Day, they argue is a perfect excuse for day drinking. They’re happy to be through, and I’d love to be happy for them, but Midterm Day was nothing but trouble. Why even bother to list it on that dumb calendar?
The rest of the day is a total blur. By the time midnight rolls around, my suitemates are out at a Midterm Day EC party they managed to arrange, but I’m ready for sleep. “Everything will be better tomorrow,” I remind myself.
Tags: 1/4 of the way done with the school year, at least it's thursday right?, at least you're only living it once, if you keep waking up day after day and reliving this kind of hell condolences to you, midterm day, tgit, well like probably (hopefully), who else still hasn't gotten any grades back in some classes?
The final presidential debate happened on Wednesday night, and that’s about enough said about that. (New York Times)
California’s attorney general has begun an investigation into Wells Fargo after the company received allegations of identity theft. Apparently, many customers had accounts opened in their names that they did not authorize. (LA Times)
The Obamas hosted their final state dinner in office, this time in honor of the Italian prime minister. (Washington Post)
Kurdish forces have continued their campaign to try and take back villages from the Islamic state. This follows another attack near the city of Mosul earlier this week. (New York Times)
Everybody wants to hug Obama via Washington Post
© 2006-2015 Blue and White Publishing Inc.