NASA is eying the six-ton Upper Atmosphere Research Satellite (UARS) as it barrels towards a yet-to-be-known location on Earth. While the chance of it crashing into North America has not been entirely ruled out, scientists expect it to fall over the Pacific Ocean later this afternoon. (Washington Post/NY Daily)

Haitian President Michel Martelly disappointed attendees of yesterday’s World Leaders Forum when he simply failed to show up. Rather than sending everyone home right away though, organizers called in Ivy League tag team Jeffrey Sachs and Wyclef Jean. (Spec/Huff Po)

Facebook announced yesterday that it wants to scrap its current image in favor of one that will literally display a timeline of your life. SNL’s Andy Sandberg was there to help make the announcement, which then erupted into a familiar routine. (NY Times/Youtube)

The MTA unveiled a pilot program that will bring cell phone service to four underground stations in Chelsea. Only AT&T and T-Mobile subscribers will have access to the new antennas—ironically, AT&T Iphone users may now have less dropped calls below ground than above it.

                                                                                               Angry mob via Wikimedia Commons