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The 27th Alfred Joyce Kilmer Bad Poetry Contest is Tonight!

Let Oscar be your guide

Tonight in 309 Havemeyer at 8:30 pm, the Philolexian Society invites you to “celebrate mediocrity in a form that is less violent than Lions football” at the 27th Alfred Joyce Kilmer Bad Poetry Contest.

Anyone who attends can show  off their horrible writings skills in front of a huge crowd – over 300 attendees in recent years.  Faculty judges Julie Crawford, Jennie Kassanoff, and Anne Prescott will award prizes and the title of Poet Laureate of the Philolexian Society.

Keep in mind the words of Oscar Wilde: “All bad poetry springs from genuine feeling.” Get writing!

The ever-witty Mr. Wilde via Wikimedia Commons

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7 Comments

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous “Mediocrity” is too generous a term for Lions football. Heck, so is “football.”

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Philo is the BEST! If you’re unsure, you need to come to this event! There’s nothing else like it on campus. It is the funniest event all year.

  • From last year's winning (losing?) poem "My Love is Like a Metaphor" says:

    @From last year's winning (losing?) poem "My Love is Like a Metaphor" My love is like the color green
    Not because I’m jealous
    But because it’s your favorite color

    My love is like a kangaroo
    It includes a warm pouch
    That you can crawl into
    When you feel like a “blind, furless, miniature newborn”
    It also gives you access to my nipples

    1. Best line says:

      @Best line My love is like a farmer/ it deals with all your bullshit

      1. Van Owen says:

        @Van Owen As I sit, broken hearted/ I came/ to shit/ but only farted…

  • You can come late! says:

    @You can come late! You can also arrive late! The contest lasts until 11 pm, if you have a late class or work or something.

  • AndEnnuiGo says:

    @AndEnnuiGo Alas, I fear I came too late/(So said I to an angry mate)/And so the prize or crown or cap/Has been lost for want of hap/And though I’ll rant and cry and pout/”Had I come on time, I may’ve pulled out!”/But be that so, ’tis my regret/That now you’ve only these couplets/And had I not been in the pews/My name in glory might be news/And for all those who read this rhyme…/Next time, really, I’ll come on time! –XO and Ennui Go

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