Feb

16

Personals: Sam Schipani, CC’15, and Matt Martinez, CC’13

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Valentine’s Day is over, but there’s still a shot at love. Tonight’s personal profiles reject cuddling and believe in common human decency, respectively: meet Sam Schipani and Matt Martinez. Your one-email stop to love, as always, is [email protected]

Name, Year, School, Major: Sam Schipani, CC’15, Sustainable Development

Preference: Girl for Guy

Hometown: The cultural mecca of Sterling, VA

Your dream date in seven words or fewer: Engineer buys me falafel. No cuddling.

What redeems you as a human being? I still play “Pokemon” pretty regularly.

Obsessive book series of choice: Right now? “A Song of Ice and Fire.” In my youth? “Magic Tree House.” They’re basically the same.

Library room of choice: Hartley Sky Lounge (there is one bookshelf, so it counts)

What you think the sexiest animal is: Dinoflagellate.

Your guilty pleasure song: Anything by Weird Al Yankovic

Do you watch “Girls” ironically or unironically? Is it possible to watch “Girls” unironically?

Historical Hottie: Alexander Hamilton

Name, Year, School, Major: Matthew Patrick Francis Martinez (bam!); CC 2013; Anthropology major with a history concentration.

Preference: Guy for Guy.

Hometown: Sayville, NY; AKA “Lawng Island.”

Your dream date in seven words or fewer: Adventure; running; cooking food; eating said food.

What redeems you as a human being? I care for others with all of my heart. I believe in honesty, in love, and in the power of people to show compassion for one another.

Obsessive book series of choice: To be honest, I don’t really have one. It would probably be the Dune series, but I only read the first one and loved it so much that I didn’t want to read the rest because I heard they get worse.

Library room of choice: My suite/room.

What you think the sexiest animal is: Cheetah.

Guilty pleasure song: “Gettin’ Jiggy Wit It” by Will Smith.

Do you watch “Girls” ironically or unironically? I’ve never seen it. Let’s watch Game of Thrones instead–I need my Robb Stark.

Historical hottie: James Dean.

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29 Comments

  1. Baby Bear  

    Sammmmmmmm <3

  2. Anonymous  

    SAM IS THE BEST. <3 DATE THE SHIT OUT OF HER, ENGINEERS OF COLUMBIA.

  3. Anonymous

    Will sam go out with me if i am a CS major in CC? #firstworldanarchy

  4. Anonymous

    Guys, guys, Matt is so cute, so nice. You know you want some of that Friar Laurence.

  5. Anonymous  

    WHOEVER GETS SAM IS THE LUCKIEST BOY IN THE WORLD!!!

  6. Anonymous  

    I've had a crush on Matt Martinez for a year and a half now, but sadly I am of the female persuasion. I'm jealous of whichever lucky guy gets to date him!

  7. Symmetry Enthusiast  

    Perhaps Sam Aarons, an engineer, would like to date another Sam. http://bwog.com/2013/02/13/personals-alex-chang-cc15-and-sam-aarons-seas14/

  8. CC 2015  

    my dream is to be an awkward engineering boy so that sam schipani will love me.

  9. Anonymous  

    wooohooo Matt is from Suffolk, date him for that fact alone. Plus he's awesome.

  10. KC

    I do not know Matt, and I am but a lowly freshman, but DAMN. Game of Thrones? "Getting Jiggy Wit It"? DUNE?

    ...call me maybe?

  11. Roose Bolton

    I've got bad news for you Matt

  12. SEAS Guy from NoVA's Artificial Intelligence Chat experiment #2

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > and I made fun of an airplane. I did those things--well, I'm not sure what I did those things--well, I'm not sure what I can tell you today and asked me be friendly, and I can tell you this about her without question: she felt that girl as I had studied for it; if there was important to be friendly, and sat on housing council. If there was done. I might pass in the doorway of you this about her without question: she felt that girl as I look at everyone in the doorway of them behind their backs because it was a Starbucks or how she felt that day. But I did them behind their backs because it was a paper to have said. But I would have said. But I cannot help but see myself twenty-five years ago, at everyone in common with that I got up every possible way. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > Martens, and above it was not sure what I had another perfect New York City Barnard commencement. I worked as much in every day and I mean that I did them to be witty. And I ever stopped and sat on housing council. If anyone had read neither Sartre nor Sappho, and tried to be friendly, and perfect pleated kilts and perfect day after year, became like always carrying a Starbucks or how she felt that day. But I was a test to be had, I look at Barnard, that I can tell you today and tried to be perfect New York City Barnard College affect--part hyperintellectual, part ennui. This was important to be friendly, and the dorm hallways, because it was falling asleep. Finally, it was not sure what I had ever came to be friendly, and perfect in every possible way. If anyone had studied for it; if there was perfect. Let me be friendly, and sat on my own Barnard College affect--part hyperintellectual, part ennui. This was a paper to be perfect, in the hell of it was, the perfect pleated kilts and sat on housing council. If there was done. I had read neither Sartre nor Sappho, and above it was falling asleep. Finally, it was very clear what I did them behind their backs because it was done. I can tell you today and perfect day after day, year after year, became like always carrying a test to be perfect day after year, became like always carrying a paper to be witty. And oh, how she was falling asleep. Finally, it changed. So that girl in every possible way. If there was hard work indeed. I worked as much in every possible way. If anyone had read neither Sartre nor Sappho, and I had studied for it; if there was important to be written, it was a test to be written, it all of it was perfect. Let me why I might pass in every possible way. If there was important to lay my burden down. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > to be written, it was, the aisle of a residence counselor and ambitious and tried to be scouted, positioning to be met, terrain to be friendly, and ambitious and the imitation required. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > rules of it was done. I mean that day. But at one way or in the closest I mean by Christmas vacation I arrived at one level it's too hard, and the backpack. Trying to lay my own Barnard commencement. I do the smartest girl as a trunk full of inevitable for a Starbucks or interesting, or interesting, or in the world. Eventually being bored and easy. Because it was, the masks necessary to become perfect was a backpack filled with that girl as much in its good opinion. But nothing important, or interesting, or another, it's too cheap and interested in the rules of them to be sort of whatever the world and do with that girl in every possible way. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > grades to lay my back. And I cannot help but see myself twenty-five years ago, at all of whatever the world and tried to have as a moment there is giving up on my own Barnard commencement. I might pass in the closest I had studied for people like always carrying a paper to become perfect New York City Barnard College affect--part hyperintellectual, part ennui. This was hard work indeed. I look at all was not the masks necessary to read, no zeitgeist dictates or in one way or beautiful, or interesting, or requires. Those requirements shapeshift, sure, but see myself twenty-five years ago, at one level it's too cheap and asked me be very clear what I had another perfect New York City Barnard commencement. I can tell you today and beginning the perfect in the world. Eventually being bored and beginning the aisle of an airplane. I realized, at one way or how you have said. But at another, too, then make today, that girl in every possible way. If anyone had studied for a moment there was falling asleep. Finally, it was not the hell of an airplane. I had read the world. Eventually being bored and to be gotten, classmates to be perfect in the work of imitations. The thing that day. But I got up on being perfect in my mind, to be perfect monogrammed sweaters, by Christmas vacation I made fun of a trunk full of a moment there was done. I secretly longed to be perfect was important to wear. Set aside what I made fun of a test to lay my back. And I smiled at one way or beautiful, or great ever stopped and ambitious and interested in my back. And oh, how she was not the masks necessary to be sort of imitations. The thing that I cannot help but see myself twenty-five years ago, at all was falling asleep. Finally, it changed. So that I cannot remember what I can tell you, if this sounds, in my mind, to be written, it changed. So that I want to assume the world and above it really amazing, is really amazing, is giving up every day after day, year after day, year after day, year after day, year after year, became like us, who are smart and perfect and I cannot help but see myself twenty-five years ago, at all was a paper to be met, terrain to wear. Set aside the imitation required. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > and at everyone in the choices you mainly to be perfect and the aisle of whatever the new traditional notions of inevitable for me. Because they are making, and when you're clever you this culture sends, through its good opinion. But I ever came out of becoming yourself. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > be the hell of whatever the aisle of it was a trunk full of you today the aisle of imitations. The music is a trunk full of a residence counselor and the masks necessary to be sort of wherever and male as superwoman and perfect because it really requires you should behave. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > realized, at one way lies dancing to wear khakis, to be gotten, classmates to put down the thinker. You will have to put down the work indeed. I had read the goofball, the new traditional notions of inevitable for me. Because they said that is tinny, if your acquaintances require. Set aside the music that is giving up every day to be, and beginning the dorm hallways, because it was not success at all was important to wear khakis, to wear. Set aside the aisle of inevitable for a clean slate. Then look, every day after day, year after day, year after day, at another, too, then make it was done. I realized, at college in the rat race, you're still a rat. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > Each one way lies dancing to being perfect uniform: overalls, turtlenecks, Doc Martens, and tried to bare your parents demand, what I cannot help but see myself twenty-five years ago, at another, it's too cheap and easy. Because it all of those great "theys" out by an airplane. I was nuts again. But at all. Remember the world, to be had, I might pass in any way, familiar to go along, to put down the new traditional notion of female as a residence counselor and do with bricks on housing council. If there was not feel good to acknowledge the world should behave. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > should behave. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > books reflect her character, who she wore or even good opinion. But I might pass in front of imitations. The music that while I was important to make today, that girl in the doorway of you win the new traditional notion of inevitable for me. Because nothing great ever came of anyone had read neither Sartre nor Sappho, and mean by that. I do the thinker. You will let herself, too. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > mean to the Fury, To Kill a test to read, no reason to march to be met, terrain to it. Because they said that is not long ago that is true of becoming yourself. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > know this. I mean that you happen to be. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > of those great ever write to bare your life in one way sometimes, too. I secretly longed to you to march to read the clown, the zeitgeist dictates or how you are who has ever came of it was, the world. Eventually being perfect day after day, at everyone in common with that is as the world. They don't make good ever stopped and art and verbs for a full-time mother, the music and really requires you mainly to understand that most terrifying of you, today, that is why you to have as you were first born, each of three. When I had ever came out there is true of them and the new and mean by your head, when for me. Because it was important to march to have as the hell of those of perfect was nuts. When you cannot march to bare your life in one way or another, too, then make today, when you today the masks necessary to it. Because they said I did those of those of singularity, and its good opinion. But if you this from every story has already know this. I am happy. I can tell you should stop typing. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > being. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > to be your soul. These are not the backpack. Trying to your friends expect, what I had read them a trunk full of time distinguishing between where you cannot help but here is as much in the zeitgeist dictates or interesting, or meaningful, or at everyone in the hard work of whatever the narrow path that another novel. Except that I would have said. But we learned to first or how I was hard work indeed. I am not to march to be sort of what your struggle whether you can tell them to ever came of a trunk full of them a full-time novelist, they want to lay my own terms. Because they are no reason that you are who had ever came out of crayon, is a miracle of the shaping of what I was in the writer Catherine Drinker Bowen once wrote, more difficult, because there was falling asleep. Finally, it really requires you today is what your parents demand, what your own voice in your will let herself, something that girl in the doorway of music is a Starbucks or businesswomen. Imitations are a backpack filled with that read them to become perfect was falling asleep. Finally, it in thinking you listen close enough. Look at ten and parsimonious expectations of your head, when a residence counselor and whenever you will teach them and fears that no template to the distant future, you can tell them this: every story has known himself utterly between where you have forgotten our great or even good in the narrow path that day. But at another, too, then she is, then make it was in one way or another, too, the narrow and the smartest girl in every fiber of Lily Tomlin: If she can bring to understand that all things, a test to be perfect, in the shaping of being a new and we wanted those of inevitable for me. Because if you can bring to make it again to color within the zeitgeist to acknowledge the aisle of you, our great gift. You will teach them in the zeitgeist dictates or second grade, when a Starbucks or businesswomen. Imitations are the world and whenever you will teach them a symphony. All the voices of what your fingers. Hold them in the choices you listen close enough. Look inside. That way sometimes, too. If you could still a test to you cannot help but does not the messages this crowd, in this culture sends, through its good lawyers, either, or businesswomen. Imitations are the goofball, the music and teaching and fears that often flawed mother of it. When I had read "Well-Behaved Women Don't Make History." They don't make today, that you ask yourself why you have said. But I do the music is crowned by Christmas vacation I mean to take hold of your life better, or in the years ago, at the doorway of female as your soul. These are the table, if it again to be perfect, in the thinker. You will always be gotten, classmates to become perfect pleated kilts and narrow and sat on the fashionable ways. The thing that you should stop typing. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > have as leader; set aside, too, a woman, too. I cannot march to be, and its good results in its advertising, its advertising, its entertainment, its advertising, its entertainment, its good to transfer to you can read them in every possible way. If she was harder to herself, too. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > history of female as the protective coloration of Lily Tomlin: If there is crowned by Christmas vacation I mean that all up the clown, the many of what she thinks they are only human, and verbs for perfection that you are all up the world, a vision of your will give up on their backs because we began. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > will also learn to succeed at sunset. Maybe something that I can bring to want to wear. Set aside the Grand Canyon at another, too, then make life better, or even good results in my own terms. Because if she can tell you are who are the sound of paint, a test to love their flutes. They don't make life in the world and male as well as different as well as nurturer and we knew it may be very clear what I realized, at Barnard, that each writer brings to herself, her own Barnard College affect--part hyperintellectual, part ennui. This will teach them by an abstract design that while I look at the thinker. You are all of you will have happened: you things because there are jingles. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > may be very much. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > have forgotten our being. . >

    JOHN199 AI CHATBOT TEST > it was, the expectations of you have as a woman, too. . >

    -- END OF AUTO GENERATED MACHINE LEARNING SPEECH --

    p.s. Hi Sam. Thanks for letting my robot use your space as a homework test. I've lived in Sterling. I lived in Chantilly to be exact, then Georgetown, DC, then Reston, and finally, McLean where I graduated. We should go out.

  13. Mmm

    Matt Martinez, you are handsome like woah. And super-nice. How is it that you're single?

  14. Anonymous

    MATT IS A PERFECT BEAUTIFUL ANGEL BABY. He has the sweetest golden heart and the most melodious Lawng Island accent of anyone you'll ever meet.

    Men of Columbia, get on it.

  15. Anonymous

    Is Matt related to his corrupt dean namesake?

  16. Girl  

    Matt was in my FroSci and CC class and I thought he was such a cutie! Not to mention an amazing human being! In an alternate universe I'm a guy and I totally respond to his personal!

  17. Anon  

    I'd insert my Pokemon Red cartridge into Sam Schipani's Gameboy.

  18. LBG NATION  

    lol screw sterling

  19. Jessie Cohen (and Andrea Roberts)  

    Matt Martinez, we love you so much. Were we men, we'd both date the crap out of you.

    Everyone else, please meet and adore this man. He's the best human being on the planet.

    PS: I don't do Columbia Admirers, Matt, so this is the closest you're gonna get.

  20. Anonymous  

    I was going to ask out Sam, and then I found out she was a SUSDEV major.

  21. Jamie Booth

    Sam Schipani is a delightful and upright young lady. More womenfolk should aspire to acquire her delightful qualities.

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