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PSA: Don’t Get Fined for Un-Stopping Your Window

He gets you.

He gets you.

A freshman emailed Bwog in the heat of his despair:

“The living situation in Hartley, John Jay, and Wallach is becoming a huge problem. People sleep with fans next to their faces, wake up sweating, and have to take multiple showers per day. It’s even boiled down to people crashing in Carman just for the air conditioning. When does summer end again?”

 

We’ve heard weather dances don’t work, but we can tell you to buy a fan and head to the air-conditioned libraries/continue your Carman sleepovers. If you were thinking about taking out your window stops, read an email we were forwarded:

Hey guys,

If you don’t know me, I’m [name redacted]–the RA on [floor redacted].

The super spoke to me this morning about uninstalled window stops. He can see that a lot of you have uninstalled them from looking up at the building from the street. He also has keys to all of your suites and can go see for himself if they’ve been uninstalled.

Housing is setting up fines for uninstalling your window stops. If you have removed them, please put them back in. If you’ve been considering taking them out–lucky you! You’ve procrastinated just long enough to save yourself hundreds of dollars in fines.

I know it’s ridiculously hot. My room is ridiculously hot too. But suffering is better when we all do it together, so to those of you basking in the cool air wafting in because you don’t have window stops: join us.

Best,

[name redacted]

A chill bro via Shutterstock

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37 Comments

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous I fucking hate this school.

    1. Columbia Alumni Assc. rep. says:

      @Columbia Alumni Assc. rep. I am sincerely very sorry to hear that? What can we do to convince you to donate later on make your experience better?

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Bwog so edgy I cut myself

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous > one student jumps to death out dorm window
    > enter window stops
    > all students must sweat
    > mental health

    1. stop it says:

      @stop it stop greentexting
      stop it right now

      1. Anonymous says:

        @Anonymous > implying it’s greentexting when the text isn’t green
        > implying you don’t love it

  • civil disobedience says:

    @civil disobedience All men recognize the right of revolution; that is, the right to refuse allegiance to, and to resist, the government, when its tyranny or its inefficiency are great and unendurable. But almost all say that such is not the case now. But such was the case, they think, in the Revolution of 1775.

    All machines have their friction; and possibly this does enough good to counterbalance the evil. At any rate, it is a great evil to make a stir about it. But when the friction comes to have its machine, and oppression and robbery are organized, I say, let us not have such a machine any longer.

    1. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous spec sucks!!!

    2. fuck yeah says:

      @fuck yeah let your life be a counter friction to stop the machine

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Now we just need someone to kill themselves because of the heat and then we can take them out again.

  • That's my RA says:

    @That's my RA Excited for this year!

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Man, even the gods of circumstance are trying to haze the freshmen. This is nuts.

  • Anonamoose says:

    @Anonamoose Anyone know which building this is? I need to know. For reasons.

    1. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous Wien, Harmony, McBain, John Jay, Hartley, Wallach, Woodbridge, Claremont, Nussbaum, Symposium, Ruggles, River, Watt, and Hogan.

      So basically all of them.

    2. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous It’s Nussbaum, Hogan, Ruggles or Claremont, I think. The reference to suites and a super makes me think Nussbaum.

      1. Claremont Resident says:

        @Claremont Resident That email’s from a Claremont RA.

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous UPPER CLASSMEN DORMS DON’T HAVE AIR CONDITIONING EITHER.

    SHUT UP FRESHMAN.

    1. depends on the dorm says:

      @depends on the dorm those of us in EC have air conditioning. it’s so cold that we’re opening the windows just to let the hot air in.

      1. My god fuckereli says:

        @My god fuckereli can you plz fall out that window you opened to let the hot air in

  • Remove the window stops says:

    @Remove the window stops Stop stigmatizing suicide. Start fostering mental and physical health in a positive manner.

    1. Board of Trustees of Columbia University says:

      @Board of Trustees of Columbia University But then we’ll have to hire a new Vice-Dean to head up a new office of anti-suicide with a staff of 5 people who do nothing only to create bureaucracy. The window stops are SAVING you money. How run around, and enjoy the bounty of this fine institution.

  • guys.. says:

    @guys.. no one is gonna break into your room; that is not allowed. Just remove the window stop and replace it at the end of the year.

    Window stops also cost like $10, so hundreds of dollars in fees seems impossible.

    1. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous it is definitely allowed for them to go into “your room”–read the housing contract. it isn’t “your room” at all.

      and it’s not impossible that they charge hundreds. it’s not about the price of the window stop, it’s this mental health insanity. reason doesn’t enter into.

      all that said, I still took mine out, and I think other people should, too. Columbia should treat us like adults, and let us have more than 2.5 inches of air. And if they won’t, it’s up to us as adults to resist.

      1. Anonymous says:

        @Anonymous haha yea fuck teh man

        #rebel
        #spiritofsixtyeight

  • Broadway resident says:

    @Broadway resident Aw yeah, no window stop.

  • Ned Stark says:

    @Ned Stark It doesn’t matter anyway, because…
    WINTER IS COMING

  • RA Dude says:

    @RA Dude Little confused why we have window stops when they make everyone, including literally ALL of my residents, miserable! Also, most of the suicides in the past here have been via other methods or on leave-of-absence.

    This whole policy sounds like a quick-fix liability-saver for Housing.
    #IgnoringBiggerProblems

    1. Hey dude says:

      @Hey dude Matt is that you?

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous “Window stops also cost like $10, so hundreds of dollars in fees seems impossible.”

    Dude, Columbia.

    1. Uhmmmm... says:

      @Uhmmmm... Running a red light is free and still can cost hundreds in fines. Fines aren’t the same thing as replacement costs.

      1. Anonymous says:

        @Anonymous BEEP BOOP
        JOKE FOUND
        PROCESSING…

        ATTEMPT UNSUCCESSFUL PLEASE INSTALL HUMOR MODULE AND TRY AGAIN.

        [ ] TRY AGAIN
        [ ] CANCEL

  • old says:

    @old “When does summer end again?”

    Just wait, they will explain everything in the annual “shoulder seasons” email

  • Arsene Wenger says:

    @Arsene Wenger Mental health and strength is a key quality I look for in my signings.

  • lol says:

    @lol did anyone notice that Housing used the salutation “Warm Wishes” in their last email?

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous It’s to prevent them from getting sued. Some spoiled kid needs to have his rich parents file a lawsuit against them for being slumlords.

  • flaming says:

    @flaming Of course the window stops were installing without adequate planning/thinking. You should be able to open your window enough so that a standard window fan can be inserted. it’s probably 14″ or so.

    1. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous That was probably intentional to deter smokers.

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