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Attn: Women of Columbia

"you really shouldn't have!"

CU being awarded Miss Competency

It’s your lucky day, women of Columbia! We know you’re really busy right now (i.e. finals prepping for that date with the cutie from down your hall omg!), but put down that hairbrush because we’re about to drop some knowledge: in this glowing article from Want China Times, Columbia has been ranked “the top choice for ‘competent’ girlfriends!”

Aww, they shouldn’t have! I’m blushing! So ladies, basically your work here is done. You can all go back to painting your nails and gossiping because ya know, ladyparts and pink things etc! Who needs books when you can be a *golly gosh* “competent girlfriend?”

Here’s an especially flattering nugget from the article:

“A netizen who graduated from the university’s computer department and goes by the name Libo said not every female student there is attractive but all of them are competent and have excellent social skills.”

We’re sure you’ve never felt so honored.

Keeping it cute and competent on pageant night because that’s all we’re good for via Shutterstock

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15 Comments

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous like this if you wish you were drunk right now

    1. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous lol i keep checking back on this and every time it has more up votes

    2. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous Like this if you are drunk right now

  • King says:

    @King Why do people complain about compliments? The article never said that this was *all* that you were good for. Plus, I have no sympathy for you since I never get any compliments. “Waah! I got a compliment!” Idiots.

    1. LOL @ says:

      @LOL @ this cat-caller logic. “I called that bitch hot, and she didn’t even thank me! Rude.”

      1. Ok, But says:

        @Ok, But @LOL @:

        I personally would not mind if someone found me attractive, but maybe that is because nobody ever has. This is why I do not give out compliments; people always find a reason to be offended.

  • heyy says:

    @heyy would be weird if it had less up votes

    1. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous rüd

  • King says:

    @King I am not endorsing cat calling, and this article was not cat-calling.

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Again, this was yet another positive article about Columbia in the press that the students are tearing dow. This was actually an internationally released article that said Cumbia women are the most competent and sophisticated in the US, and that men should look for girlfriends here. Sounds pretty complementary to me.

    1. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous Sorry about the spelling errors. New iPhone.

  • Alum says:

    @Alum Why on earth did you delete the comment above?

    1. read bwog better says:

      @read bwog better from the comment policy

      “A comment that has a difference of five or greater dislikes to likes at any time will have its opacity automatically reduced to a light gray.”

    2. Anon says:

      @Anon Nobody deleted anything. People just collectively decided that it was a dumb-as-shit thing to say and responded accordingly

  • The Cuntocracy says:

    @The Cuntocracy err, why is this a problem? I mean, I am pleased that Columbia women are considered competent as opposed to incompetent losers?Why is this a bad thing? You know why I am really flattered? Because The China Times realized that there were even woman at Columbia! Here’s looking at you Bwog. Every time you say women,feminism, and all that stuff, its always Barnard, Barnard, Barnard. I feel like I gave up my vagina to be here. Would it hurt to get a little more attention here? On the newspaper and between the sheets?
    Sincerely,
    The Cuntocracy

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