Jan

25

The Heights Gap

Written by

The Lows replace The Heights in Bwog's heart
The Lows replace The Heights in Bwog's heart

The Lows replace The Heights in Bwog’s heart

“Some say The Heights will end in fire / Some say in ice. / From what we’ve tasted of desire / Bwog holds with those who favor fire.”

Either way, The Heights is currently out of the picture for freshmen trying to get by without a fake, and for anyone who wants a delicious marg. 1020 started scanning this weekend and doesn’t want that crowd. The world is practically coming to an end, folks. So what will fill the gap before Doomsday? Our hopes and wishes theories are below.

  • Freshmen flock to Furnald; RAs never bother to make their rounds there; second most epic party in Columbia history.
  • Chipotle will stay open past 9 and become a really awesome bar.
  • Butler turns into a rave at night, and pretty much all of NYC shows up to the CU campus to party.
  • We start going to those clubs downtown that we always said we’d go to.
  • Drunch all day instead of going out at night.
  • Deluxe Tries To Be A Party Space Part II.
  • CC/SEAS/BC students annoy GS students at Haakon’s Hall.
  • Tap a Keg rises to glory, and everyone stops at Mexican Deli for the best tacos (and Takis) around.
  • We invert our lifestyles to better fit who will serve us alcohol.
  • This begins the age of Columbia’s prohibition. All the bars start scanning IDs, then the liquor stores. Students start brewing moonshine out of their dorm basements.
  • Everyone just drinks wine alone in their room.

Much too classy via Shutterstock

Tags: , , , , , , ,

8 Comments

  1. BSGS

    "CC/SEAS/BC students annoy GS students at Haakon’s Hall."

    lol

    Responsible young CC/SEAS/BC adults are always willkommen at Haakon's.

  2. Mexican deli

    great food, never card, always deliver

  3. Peaches  

    >Everyone just drinks wine alone in their room

    Wait, not everyone does this? This may explain why I don't meet new people...

  4. @theGreeks

    This is the moment you've been whining about for years. Open parties. All the time. Fight through the exhaustion. Fight the administration if they fight. Step up and fill the gap for campus. You might not be the Greek life we deserve. But answer the call now and you'll be the one we need.

  5. Drunkte  

    When I had journeyed half of my life's way
    I found myself within a concrete jungle
    for I had lost the fake ID that should not stray

    Ah, it is hard to speak of finals,
    those savage days, dense and difficult,
    which even in recall renew my stress

    so bitter cold is hardly more severe!
    But to retell the good discovered at the Heights,
    I'll also tell the other things I saw.

    I cannot clearly say how I had entered
    the Heights; I was so full of drink just at
    the point where I lost my wallet and sense.

    But when I'd reached the top of the stairs
    it admitted me from the line
    that had harassed my heart with so much fear

© 2006-2015 Blue and White Publishing Inc.