The American capitalist spirit is at its highest after Thanksgiving. What, you can’t tell?

The requisite post-Thanksgiving hangover took a toll on more than peoples’ bodies—the stock market experienced a wide-reaching drop on Monday, partly due to a 6.4% decline in in-store sales from last year. AAPL lost 3.2% and is now trading at the 0h-so-affordable price of $115.07, giving dads everywhere all the more reason to buy themselves an early holiday present. (Reuters)

While you were discovering new things about the relatives you haven’t seen in 10 years, or were discovering new relatives altogether, a famed Nazi hunter discovered that former Nazi Alois Brunner died four years ago in Syria. Just as your Thanksgiving scraps lie on the actual trash heap, Brunner lies on the trash heap of history. (TIME)

There are certain things that never end but sorely need to. One is that awkward Thanksgiving conversation with your uncle. The other is Ray Rice’s domestic abuse case. While Rice wonders if an NFL team will ever hire him again after the drunken debacle he got himself into, his wife Janay makes the rounds on news broadcasts like “Today,” proving her fortitude and trying to convince everyone that he’s a “good guy” who “made a mistake.” (NY Times)

The UN’s World Food Programme cut its aid to Syrian refugees because it ran out of money to continue providing food vouchers to the 1.6 million people who have fled from the country in the three years since civil war broke out. WFP has said that its decision will be “disastrous.” Go put your leftover turkey to good use. (UK Telegraph)

Shit goes down after Thanksgiving via Shutterstock