“So, this curve, it represents my grading policy … and those red x’s, they represent how you’ll feel about this class by the end of the semester …”

It’s true, classes have barely started – but, as the indefinable They governing our colloquial expressions say, only three things in life are inevitable: death, taxes, and weird professors. In this first week, the realm of syllabi and awkward silences, many of your professors probably haven’t planned out lectures beyond reading over a typo-ridden document they slapped together last night while you were finishing your last Netflix marathon of winter break. And, as such, they’ll have to find some way to keep you imprisoned in some poorly-heated lecture hall for a full class period, whether it’s with bad puns or rambling stories about their dogs.

Bwog wants to know all your professors’ strange opening remarks – inept meme references, surprisingly adept Star Wars references, and everything in between. Send them in to tips@bwog.com, or, if you’re still in more of a Netflix-marathoning mood, put them in the comments below.

Five minutes into the lecture and already barely making sense via Wikimedia Commons