Panicked? Tired? We get it.

February is the shortest month of the year, but somehow, it always manages to feel the longest – four full weeks, no days off, and midterms piling up on top of each other like some kind of atrocious academic avalanche. There are, of course, a variety of ways to face your midterms: you can work hard to conquer your tests, pretend that you’ll somehow be fine even if you spend zero time studying, or just curl up in a corner and accept your fate. Last weekend, Bwog saw all three.

Trying Our Best:

• Used the Friday Carman fire drill to find the motivation to write my Dante essay in a single session at Butler
• Related: After finishing said essay, was told I looked and smelled terrible due to exhaustion and overwork. Thanks Columbia!
• Did homework at the Natural History Museum’s space center
• Cramps got so bad that my Barnard GYN prescribed me painkillers. The painkillers cost $38 but by the time I had time to pick them up, my cramps were gone. Midol saved the day.
• Related: Free-bled a lot, not understanding why I had my period when I was taking my birth control ? (My GYN doesn’t understand, either)
• And: Did a lot of very small loads of laundry to get the blood out of my clothes. Killed the earth, wasted money, etc. Accidentally left one load in the washing machine for 8 hrs, came back and no one had moved it!
• Dropped my phone in the oven while trying to toast pop tarts (it was ok)
• Somehow got to and from the UES while wasted on Saturday night.
• Got so excited/nervous about my Thursday night booty call that I accidentally threw away my toothbrush
• Related: Forgot about above Friday morning and got out of bed super late…. went to brush my teeth and couldn’t find my toothbrush/an alternative, so I had to go to class with dick on my breath
• Woke up early to go to the Cloisters for two class requirements – didn’t see anybody from class there at all, including the professor
• Felt culturally enlightened as I looked at medieval French, German, and Spanish art
• Thought I got stuck in an elevator & pressed the emergency call button, realized I didn’t press the floor & hung up
• Nude modeled on Saturday for Artists Society. It started off awkward and just got more awkward the longer I had to stay naked in front of total strangers.
• Got lost in FiDi, which is the worst because wtf is down there besides one World Trade
• Was the only person—out of four who were assigned—to provide food for my floor’s “required study break” despite being the most disconnected from the floor
• Did laundry for the first time this semester and felt a great sense of accomplishment. Also took the opportunity to take a nap on warm laundry
• Tried dried squid in Chinatown
• For the first time there was a roommate battle between my two roommates that didn’t involve me. It was very entertaining to watch

Pretending They Aren’t Coming:

• Got free halal because a guy getting halal at the same time as I was thought that being in the band made me cool enough to deserve free halal. (Thanks, CUMB.)
• Met a style associate at Forbes who requested to follow me on Instagram with the excuse that he could “tutor me in Spanish if I ever need help” – I guess Instagram is the best medium to do that
• Came down with some cough/fever/headache/congestion/sinus ailment; tried to convince myself I was fine and went to a basement punk show on outskirts of Brooklyn Saturday night. Coughed up phlegm into my coat sleeve throughout the concert.
• Learned how to make multi line snapchats, nuff said
• Got sent some cookies from SDT eat late–the bag says “KDR ❤️s you”
• Went to my first rock concert in the basement of someone’s house in Brooklyn (thank god for ear plugs but it was fun)
• Worked Lunar Gala for 7 hours and thankfully ate only due to the amazingness of Bwog staff
• Pet three dogs
• Related: Girlfriend made fun of how excited I get when I see dogs
• Forced my Uber pool driver to not pick anyone else up during my $50 dollar trip, still payed half the price
• It was my roommate’s birthday on Saturday, aka the whole weekend was her birthday.
• Modelled for a really cool clothing startup
• Went to see Deadpool on Saturday with friends and went to get chicken and waffles, group was cat called a few times and someone said “thank you” in Mandarin to my Korean friend
• Then: Sat down for like hours after to do homework and got nothing done
• Had a HORRIBLE beer pong partner at an NYU pregame, she thought her suckiness was funny but I didn’t because I hate losing
• Went to Koronets and witnessed friend charitably give half her slice to a broke Fordham student who had no cash on her
• But then: Fordham student works at AA in SoHo and offered us a discount as payback for the pizza
• Went to Tom’s for the first time and only got juice
• Made a sandwich while I had the munchies on Saturday. It was godly.
• Went to 1020 and managed to snag large front booth from weird young professionals drinking wine and eating chips and guacamole
• And then: Thought they would leave their half uneaten bag of chips, got very excited about it, but they came back for them
• Went to arts and crafts Friday night and it was wonderful as always, although my friend and I witnessed a really gross Tinder date in progress
• Played a drinking game based on my own fanfiction (with the friend with whom I’d cowritten the fanfiction and one other friend whom we roped into our shenanigans.) It was pretty successful – we were drunk after just one chapter.
• Drank a lot of Four Loko before and during the basketball game with Dartmouth.
• Went to the Met with my friends; took selfies in every mirror that we encountered (except for a couple of rooms where security guards gave us strange looks.)
• My mom visited and got a hotel in SoHo, we went out to dinner Saturday night and got wine drunk, discussed the possibility of me getting a tattoo, she was indifferent and even a little enthused about it while drunk, hoping sobriety won’t change her attitude
• And then: Got a bathing suit half off because the hotel in SoHo my mom booked happened to be three blocks away from the AA
• Went to Kanye night at a nightclub in the meat packing district and snap chatted obnoxiously and drunk texted girlfriend to trek all the way down
• Related: Then came back at 3 am and walked into friends room and ate her mozzarella sticks while listening to TLOP and left
• Took the public pus for the first time. Was very impressed, would take the M4 again
• Re-read Dante’s inferno while deep-conditioning my hair.

Accepting Our Fates:

• Shouted “FUCK” in public places very loudly twice in one day. My filter is disappearing faster and faster each day. (Thanks, CUMB.)
• Girl I babysit unsuccessfully tried to teach me how to play Minecraft, I don’t think she likes me anymore now that she knows I’m a fool
• Discovered I suck at Cards Against Humanity
• Got sexiled at 2 am with no warning at all, broke into someones suite and slept on the couch in their lounge
• Didn’t realize a first draft of an essay due Friday would be graded until 1 hr before deadline…turned in the worst essay of my life…
• Had a few really nice walks to 96th because of the 1 shut down
• Stayed up ridiculously late to see a boy with only a single Smirnoff ice for company
• Related: Didn’t even finish Smirnoff ice because it was warm
• My family came into town on Sunday and brought me grapefruits and pots and pans bc my suitemate who moved out two weeks ago took all the pots and pans with her.
• My friend got really drunk and wrapped me up in toilet paper like a mummy
• Felt shitty about not being able to fit boyfriend jeans; ate one pound of carbs, squatted for an hour and put on leggings to feel better
• And then: Had to unzip my mom jeans at a mac n cheese restaurant because they refused to stretch with my stomach
• Skipped a party to go to bed early; ended up going to bed at 1am anyway.
• Looked at friends’ snapchats from other schools and drunkenly engaged in an oration on how I could be at a state school right now doing relatively zero work and that anybody going to said schools and complains should be taken outside and shot. Deleted that in the morning;
• Celebrated two months with the same pimple on my cheek <3
• Was crushed in line for Mel’s (honestly why it’s a burger place that also sells drinks its not that exciting. I’m still bitter) and the girl on top of my foot graciously told me, “Sorry, don’t worry, I just saw a psychic, I’m working on my aura!” Still very confused and have not forgiven her
• And after that: In lieu of this, friends forced me to go to lion’s head. sad
• Went to Natural History Museum yesterday to get work done and finished nothing, then finished hw at 3 am last night
• Briefly abandoned my friends in front of Barnard because they were walking too slowly and I really needed to pee.
• Did tarot readings for all my roommates. They all got positive shit like “big things ahead! and don’t rest on your laurels despite all your great accomplishments!” and I got the three of swords: ” a pure piercing sorrow of the mind, a card of mental illness and depression that represents restriction and obstacles of thought.”
• Didn’t study for a quiz on Monday so I’ve decided I’m gonna drop the class; focus on succeeding in other areas of my life.

If you (or your weekend) relate to the emotions expressed in this post, hit us up with stories at tips@bwog.com or on our anonymous tip form.

A dog cute enough to make you temporarily forget about midterms via Peter – Husky dawg, CC BY 2.0