Really going wild this spring break.

And we back, bitches! Bwog hopes you had a warm, wet, and wild spring break! Here’s just a little taste of what we were up to…

Warm

  • Went to Florida with friends like a cliché college student and got a sunburn the first day like a typical white.
  • Lounged in Vondelpark chain-smoking joints under the afternoon sun.
  • Got hella burned in Miami, which turned into a very nice tan until my entire chest and shoulder area peeled.
  • Was thousands of miles away from the NYC blizzard.

Wet

  • Gave numerous bodily fluids (pee, blood, puke) to the Atlantic Ocean.
  • Lied about liking beer.
  • ​Didn’t drink a drop of alcohol this Spring Break. Oops?
  • Didn’t get rained on by a drop of water (or snow) this Spring Break. Not oops.
  • Finally went skinny dipping.
  • Successfully *didn’t* fall into an Amsterdam canal.

Wild

  • Played Paranoia (drinking game) and found out all my friends think I’m most likely to get knocked up first. (Good reminder to take my birth control! yikes!)
  • Spent one night in a NYC hotel, got Chinese food delivered straight to the door, ate it naked in bed while watching Rushmore. Truly the height of luxury.
  • Did psychedelics for the first time. Highly recommend.
  • Was not sober for a single 24-hour period between Thursday March 9th and today (Monday March 20th).
  • Showed up to the airport drunk to fly to Miami.
  • Had a very fun St. Patrick’s Day when I woke up with a wicked hangover. But, my friend dragged me to Mel’s where between me and two Fiji boys we finished two whole pitchers of beer.
  • Saw the parade and drank more at an Irish pub in Midtown where I danced with a very energetic (and cute!) Irishman (like, FROM from ireland, visiting New York).
  • Saw our lord and savior, Tim Tebow, God’s favorite son, in person.
  • Held someone’s snake.
  • Got locked out of my Airbnb within two hours of arriving.

Photo via me, bitch.