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It’s So Fucking Humid

it’s as humid as the rainforest

Welcome to your October tropical vacation, courtesy of global warming! The leaves may be about to change, but it’s SWEATer weather for now.

I come to you from a campus drenched in sweat- and it’s not just from stressing over midterms.

Absolutely nothing seems to be fully dry, and with our lovely City-mandated heat now pumping, even the rare day of misty coolness has no impact, since every building has been transformed into some sort of hellish steam room. And on warm days, temperatures that would otherwise be pleasant or at least tolerable send everyone scurrying for shade and the nearest cool beverage, sweat drenching their summery clothes that look increasingly bizarre as mid-October draws onward. It feels like Satan himself has turned New York into a huge cauldron to steam us all like unfortunate, sweaty little dumplings.

Spare a thought, East Coast types who are more inured to this tortuously subtropical version of “fall,” for the West Coasters among us, who come from a land where the weather is more civilized.  While we’re all in pain, their suffering is almost incalculable- waking up with sheets drenched in sweat (and coming back at the end of the day to find them still damp), forced to wear moisture-wicking gym clothes wherever they go, shuddering at the sensation of pollution condensing out of the air onto their skin. To come from a land where the weather doesn’t try to violently smother you with a wet blanket and get hit with this (during midterms, no less) is a terrible fate.

At this point, please, bring on the blizzards- at least then there’s somewhere to hide. Let’s just hope this grossness breaks before mildew engulfs the entire city.

Photo via Wikipedia Commons

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3 Comments

  • my ass says:

    @my ass sweat

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Uh, New York is always warm in September and October.

    1. Youngweon Lee says:

      @Youngweon Lee Thank you for your valuable contribution to this discourse

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