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Dog Bwog

Today we received a message from a dog who missed our staff writer application deadline.

The dog was really sad. We told him he could still post on our site. He started howling about his resume and Spec being crappy and whatever, but eventually we convinced him to submit an article. And, no, we didn’t let him write about Benjamin Pierce ;)

Now, this is the first time Bwog has published anything written by a dog. Some of us worried that posting this article might make us seem, “this is a stupid idea,” and “I just don’t get why we have to print this,” but after the rest of us accused them of being “literally cats,” we decided to publish the piece.

We’ve made clarifying notes where necessary, but have edited nothing. Know that what you’re about to read is 100% poodle.

**If you have never heard of dogs, or would like to learn more about them, please refer to the note at the bottom of this article.

Bark,

Bark bark bark bark bark woof bark bark woof woof bark bark. Bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark. Bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark, bark bark bark. Woof woof woof woof bark bark bark bark. Woof wooooffff wooofff woof bark woof woof woooofff bark bark.

Woof, woof bark bark woof woof bark bark bark woof woof woof. Bark woof bark bark, bark woof bark bark — woof bark bark woof. Bark bark bark bark bark danke bark bark bark bark bark bark. Woof woof woof woof. Woof bark woof bark woof bark woof bark woof woof. Woof. Bark woof. Bark.

“Meow?” Bark. Woof.

“Meow?” Woof. Bark.

Bark bark woof so-called “meow” bark bark. Bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark; bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark. Bark bark bark bark woof woof. Bark bark @barrk ^_^ bark woof. Woof woof woof bark bark woof.

Bark bark ahooooooo bark woof . Woof woof bark bwog bark woof bark bark. Bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark arf bark bark bark bark bark teenage angst bark bark bark bark bark bark bark. Woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof rotfl woof bark bark woof bark bark bark woof woof bark bark bark bark woof bark woof woof woof woof woof bark.

<Howl> <Howl>

Bark bark woof woof woof. Bark bark bark woof. Bark bark bark woof woof woof woof woof bark bark woof woof woof bark bark bark woof woof. Bark bark bark bark bark. Bark woof. Bark woof bark bark bark. Bark Bark woof woof woof woof bark bark woof woof bark woof bark bark bark woof bark woof woof bark. Bark woof bark bark. Woof woof bark bark. Woof.

Bark Bark,

Woof

 

**Dogs are mammals in the canine family. Experts believe they are descended from wolves, but no one  knows for sure, and no one cares. My dog used to watch Scandal. Humans have convinced dogs to “sit,” “roll over,” “heel,” and eat cat food.

Leap via Pixabay

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4 Comments

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Woof!

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Bork?

    1. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous stop it. You’re doin me a frighten!

  • Bark Woof says:

    @Bark Woof

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