Senior staff writer Owen Fitzgerald-Diaz is super fucking tired of the subway being such a pain in the ass and has some ideas about how to fix it.

I am tired of changing from the 1 train to the A train being such a ~process~. Columbia has $10B and I feel it’s only fair we put some money into improving the subway, and to start with let’s build a tunnel with a super fast, state-of-the-art moving sidewalk between 116-Columbia University and 116/8th Avenue. If PrezBo ponied up for this, it would probably save me some very cold walks in the winter and a whole lot of stair-climbing in Morningside, and it could serve as a precursor to an eventual uptown crosstown train (which God fucking knows we need).

While we’re at it, Columbia could put some money into helping the MTA expand service around MoHi (instead of, for example, blowing up beloved local fast food restaurants to replace them with the architectural equivalent of Game of Thrones’ ghost grass). Trains running along Amsterdam and Columbus would be delightful, and passageways or crosstown shuttle trains (a la 7 train, if you will) could be easily incorporated.

Winter is coming. Stop making me walk places. :(

A big moving bread box via Wikimedia Commons