In light of the hits and misses Bwog witnessed over the holiday, we have some recommendations for next year for those seeking their lovers’ favor.

Roses: College students living in dorms don’t own fucking vases bro. Some will end up crammed awkwardly into the necks of soju bottles filled with water; the rest will be thrown out. Such a sad mistake. You should not.

Chocolates: Delicious. Nutritious. Romantic. Chocolates are a great gift. If your lover hates chocolate, just change their personality, because they’re objectively wrong. You definitely should.

Diamonds: It’s too soon in your life to be getting married, and they’re too small and easy to lose if they’re attached to non-ring jewelry. Besides, you probably can’t even afford a good one. You should not.

Cards: As long as you make an effort. Don’t just go to the store and write your name in ballpoint pen in the cheapest Hallmark card available. Hand-draw that shit or write a cute note and you’re golden. Overall, this is a solid move—you should.

Balloons: They’ll float away. And what even is the point of a balloon? You should not.

Drugs: Bwog can’t publicly support breaking the law, but we do strongly support vibing. We can’t explicitly say you should or authority figures will be mean to us, but we won’t say you shouldn’t. All we’ll say is that in surveys, many lovers report that they are people who like being given drugs.

Image via Flickr