Either you are the kind of person who is permanently exhausted or blissfully unaware. We are the first. Don’t be us. Be the second type of person—they live much happier lives.

As college students, it is almost impossible to go through an entire semester without feeling tired. However, when we don’t sleep, bad things happen. We may think we can pull consecutive all-nighters and all will be right but alas that is often not the case. Apparently, when you are sleep-deprived, you exhibit the same behaviors as being drunk. All the negatives of being hammered without any of the fun vibes. At least you still have some entertaining stories to recount either way! You don’t have to be drunk to do all these crazy things and below the proof is in the pudding. 

• Slept through my 10-person writing class (didn’t adjust my sleep schedule with melatonin when I flew over to the States because of NSOP—HUGE MISTAKE).

• Sent an email (or multiple) to professors or teachers with the wrong name.

• Sent an angry email to my Mum about something we were disagreeing over while I was in class but on my school email (not personal email) and got it blocked by IT where he kindly told me to rephrase it and for us to work on our communication skills (absolutely mortifying).

• Sent a text to a friend’s boyfriend rather than said friend in response to something they were ranting to me about (he already wasn’t my biggest fan…).

• Forgot about a 10-minute presentation I had on female representation in media and had to quickly put up images of random female-centered books and films into Google Slides and totally winged it (I still held a blank piece of paper to sell it)—my partner did nothing at all but attach a 5-minute video of himself skateboarding around an empty car park and I somehow incorporated that even into an allegory for the cyclical nature of sexism in society?!

• Missed many trains, buses, trams, etc. Really any sort of transportation you name it, and we’ve probably done it.

• Missed not one but two international flights back home to Australia (and at Christmas time too which is peak travel time for homesick Aussies trying to return home from the States).

• Once instead of setting an alarm I somehow made a new contact in my phone with my own number and just the name “Sleep” on it… definitely a sign things were particularly dire.

• Missed the group entrance time to Cinecittà studios for my program in Rome and had to charm the security guards round the back to let me in and snuck past the Ancient Rome sets and pretended I was there the whole time in my Italian cultural class (as it was a mandatory field trip).

• Befriended a grad student who worked in the computer lab of the business school at my old college just so I could get him to swipe me into the MBA student lounge at odd hours when I desperately needed the Dunkin Donuts iced coffees in their vending machines (he wondered why I only ever wanted to hang out at like 10 pm on weeknights… and only in the one spot…).

• One time I was so tired I decided I needed to own a pair of slippers. I went to the store and stared at the slipper aisle for several minutes until I decided on a size XL pair of men’s slippers. I do not wear men’s XL. I then lost my purse in another aisle because I was so tired that I forgot it somewhere else in the store.

• I used to row in high school and had to wake up at 4 am for my 5 am training sessions 3 times a week. I once forgot to set my alarm, woke up in a panic, got fully dressed and even put on sunscreen. Then proceeded to eat breakfast and wake up my Dad before actually checking the time and seeing that it was only 2 am.

• Walked three blocks in the wrong direction and did not realize. Then I looked on Google Maps and still failed to realize that I was walking in the wrong direction. 

• Tried to get dressed and ready for class only to realize that it was Monday and I was going to the wrong place. 

• Slept through my alarm and arrived 30 minutes late to my Italian final (my teacher was NOT happy).

• Went to a class that I had registered for last semester.

• Looked furiously for my ID only to realize that it was in my pocket the entire time.

Be sure to get some sleep, or you will end up like us xx.

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