There are many ways to maintain a connection with your loved ones back home while building a life in New York. Here are some of Bwog’s tips for keeping in touch.

Coming to the Columbia in the fall for the first time—or to any new college, for that matter—is a socially transformative experience. For people like myself who spent most of their lives in the same place, this might be one of the first times you’ve been immersed in a community full of students, faculty, and staff with a variety of different experiences. Talking to new people in my clubs, classes and around the city has been one of my favorite parts of being a Columbia student, but maintaining relationships from the first 18 years of my life was also important to me as an incoming freshman.

Staying in touch with old family and friends is something that many new students worry about. Finding times that match up between busy schedules and maintaining friendships/relationships with people (sometimes even in completely different time zones) can seem like a daunting task. However, I know many people (myself included) that have figured out a balance of incorporating their high school life into their college life that works for their unique situation. Here are some of my best tips/words of advice from my first year:

1. Set reasonable goals: This is especially useful if you’re going to college particularly far from home or are an international student, but it’s relevant for everyone. Trying to keep in contact with all 500 people from your high school is not only impossible, but can also be kind of stressful to juggle with starting a new life at college. Instead, I would make a list of relationships that are really important to you and you are willing to put effort into maintaining. Make sure to really commit to reaching out to this smaller group of people.

2. Have a feasible schedule, and (try to) stick to it!: I am a person who thrives off organization—it definitely helps me feel more in control. We all know that life gets busy, but if you make it a priority to call your parents a couple times a week or your friend once a month, you’ll get into the habit of keeping consistent contact. If you use a calendar or academic planner, make sure to add this to it!

3. Incorporate calls/video chats into your daily routine: There are many ways to incorporate connecting with people from your home life into your college life. If you always like to give your dad a quick call while you swing by Liz’s to get your coffee or call your friends while taking a walk down Riverside Park, make it a routine! Even if you have 15 minutes to spare while doing your makeup, one of your friends will appreciate you calling to catch up. A prime time to call a friend or family member is also when walking to class or waiting in line for food at the dining hall.

4. Plan lower budget trips or host friends from close by (if this is possible!): While traveling or hosting friends is not an option for many, meeting a friend in person a couple times a year will give you something to look forward to, especially if you don’t spend much time at home. I was really lucky in that a good friend of mine goes to Rutgers in New Jersey, and she took the train up a few times to Barnard for about $10-$15. There’s also several websites that display cheaper airline fares for students, such as kayak.com.

5. Don’t discount texts: Your relationships with friends, significant others, and family members will inevitably change when going to college; instead of living your day-to-day lives in front of each other, calls become more catch-up style where you recount your life events to other people. Even though you’re not living your lives together, sending a text about your random run-in on College Walk that you think no one cares about or sending a photo of something that reminded you of them can make it feel like you are still experiencing things with each other (to an extent).

6. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself: Going to college will inevitably lead to change in your life, so let yourself experience everything that is happening around you. If you’re not perfect all the time about reaching out to people, it’s ok. Relationships and friendships change over time, and not everything is within our control. Do your best to connect to the people you love as often as you can, and be open to new people and opportunities. You got this!

Image via Bwarchives