Staff writer Emorie Hayes experiences the stairwell to hell…

I have the true delight of living in Carman Hall. An array of partygoers push past me as I march back to my dorm, the precious gem that is Carman 205, the home of the Capybara shanties. I only ever see my roommates in between classes. Thankfully not when I first roll out of bed, eye crusts and all, taking on the world. 

Anyway, as I hopped from step to step, the staircase singing with each step of my boot, the second floor door was finally in sight, sweet salvation from the staircase that, no matter if it’s only three flights, consistently leaves my lungs punched and my ego shattered. The sweet halls finally embraced me, and I fought off doing a jig all the way to my dorm, just happy to be done with the two lectures I had today. My life is so hard…today drained me.

After throwing all of my junk onto my bed, I slip out of my dorm and walk back down the cold cerulean dorm hall, the elevators taunting me as if it would be socially acceptable to use them on this floor. As I get closer to the stairwell, I’m sucker punched with the image of an awkward couple at the end of the hall. A girl, her hand on the shoulder of a taller guy, both of their eyes flitting around like she’s flashing her ankle and the town square will arrest both of them for adultery.

The man, no, boy, holds intense eye contact with me as I continue walking, as if he can’t decide between wanting to blow me up with his mind or invite me as a third. They continue to hold eye contact with me as I finally reach the stairwell to heaven, or the stairwell away from this entire situation.

As I walked to my friend’s door, I did not realize that this was only the beginning. From going to the lounge to watch a movie or visiting other friends on higher floors, I would run into a few couples that never quite escaped middle school, who would rather get cumbersomely uncomfortable in public yet must show the world their love. At what point will shame hit for them? 

Probably never, but I look forward to holding disgustingly long eye contact with them once more!

Carman Hall via Bwog Archives